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Getting real or getting nowhere- one of the main topics in 2018

Welcome in the year 2018, dear Ones. May it be a happy, healthy and abundant one for you. 2018 reduces to 11 in numerology, what is the masternumber of divine service.

In 2018 one big topic will be to co-operate with the divine, to bring heaven down to earth, what might sometimes be a heavy task with Saturn staying in Capricorn until 2020.

I am writing about it, as I can relate to these energies very much. I´ve got Neptun near my Midheaven in my birthchart and Venus and Chiron in Pisces, so working in divine service is my lifepath. But I´ve been sended into my mission with a lot of grounding energies and for very good reasons! I´m a double capricorn with the ruler of Capricorn, Saturn, squaring my Sun.

Getting real or getting nowhere, that´s been my task and it will be a global topic in this year.

See Jupiter will stay in Scorpio almost all of the year and he´ll blow up all the dirty, dark stuff. Please do not despair, but welcome it. It´s been there all the time. I had to face some really ugly stuff myself last year, shattering a lot of illusions, but it is necessary as denial destroys us otherwise.

Well and when it comes to Saturn I´ve gotta explain his energies a bit. Saturn has a bad reputation as he is seen as the reaper and bringer of hardship and limitations. Although he seems to have been pu(ni)shing me a lot in my life, I came to a point where I started to understand this energy better. He is the old zen-master, making you climb the mountain every morning to carry up the water and you might curse him for that, what leaves him totally unimpressed. He holds the vision of your strong body, mind and spirit, and he´ll make sure to bring it into the physical reality. You can trust that every hardship he delivers is needed. Saturn is also the planet of time, structure and matter. On a global level his energies have been abused to install regulations and rigid laws, the old matrix of destortion is created with a shadow-aspect of Saturn. He´s been used to build the old system. Almost all energies have been misused by the dark forces ruling this planet the last few thousand years, so do not blame Saturn, but  the global state of (un-)consciousness.

But Saturn working for divine service in this year, will bring in the cosmic law. Spirit is going to matter literally. People can not act out destructive and expect to not receive the fruits of their actions. You´ll see quite some tough deliveries this year. Saturn brings tangible results and as he is not afraid to take away all that is not of integrity. Think of the old zen-master again. Could someone very mighty abuse him? Of course. But he´ll never give up, but wait patiently until time is ripe, like a Yoda would wait for the right timing. Saturn knows all about the right timing. It is now.

What does that mean for your personal life? It means it is a perfect year to focus on the important things, those that really matter and to let go of clutter. It means that when you have something you wanted to realize for a long time, now you can take actions to make it real. Saturn is not very likely to bring overnight success, but when you take small steps on a regular basis, you´ll get tangible results. Make sure what you want to bring down to earth is of integrity and for a higher purpose, than you´ll be supported. And when you have worked for a long time on such a project, it will now come into fruition.

There is something I have to adress to the spiritual community. We didn´t enter earth to dream us away into other realms, to swagger with our important pastlifes or the name of our guru and we didn´t enter this planet to find more ways to escape. We came to embody the change. We have to get real.  I am working with energies on a quantum level as a healer and I am using words and ideas as an author, but being real means holding a stranger in your compassionate arms while his sobbing wets your shoulder and his pain hits your energy field…and to deliver a safe h(e)aven of light and love in this moment, not as an idea, but in reality. It means to buy a bowl of soup for a homeless person or to gift some of your unnecessary clutter to people in need. Compassion in your daily actions. Heaven on earth.  Shine your immense light!

This picture shows a gem a very dear and lovely friend just gifted me. The picture with the Roses is carved in bone, what is a perfect expression of my birthchart-energies and fitting very much with the  energies of 2018.

 

 

Why the scapegoat was so important for the old earth communities

The scapegoat had an important role in the history of social communities. As people did not dare to look at their not accepted “shadow-side”, they took all their sins onto an animal and killed it or punished it  and sended it into the desert.

It´s been the way how people could still live together, whos characters had a lot of shortcommings. Just pretend it´s not there, than all is well…except for the goat, but well better to sacrifice a goat than to risk that  the community would break apart.

In the old testament, you find the description, that 2 goats were used. One has been slaughtered and her blood brought into “the holy of holy” and sprinkeled onto the “seat of mercy” (you may ponder a bit, who might really own such a place and receive all the worship) and the other goat was sended into the desert.

It is the reason why it is said that Yeshua died for our sins and the reason why we pray to a dead man on a cross instead of seeing in him a living example of the divine. Using a human as a scapegoat has a lot of advantages. You get rid of someone who doesn´t please the ones that are in charge and you make sure the rest of the community behaves to not experience to be a scapegoat also.

A lot of lightworker have experienced this in the past too, when being the shaman or the witch. You had a lot of knowledge and knew also about the peoples sins, because they came to you when they needed help, plus you had the inner knowing. When the community had a bad harvest or another misfortune, you had to pay the price and been their scapegoat.

A scapegoat is a very practical thing, it prevents people from being responsible for their own actions.

I´m a double capricorn, a mountaingoat, and I know all about being the scapegoat. I´ve played this role so often. My very existance in this life was the result of a “sin”. My mother couldn´t stand my presence, that´s why she gave me into an orphanage. There the nuns, never allowed to have a good orgasm, treated me badly, too. I remember, that even just two years old, I´ve been punished for the stuff the “sweet, nice girl” did. I can not count how often that happened in my life. I learned all about the unwanted, suppressed, ignored. And that imprint sticked and brought replays.

The point is that it doesn´t work. It is the reason why mankind runs in circles and nothing ever changes. Whatever you hide in the shadows will come out again and again until it is accepted, integrated, transformed.  If you pretend you do not know that the major is mollesting woman, you will ignore it until you or a loved one become a victim and maybe noone will listen to you than. You´ll be even marked as the one who´s disturbing the peace. That´s how communities are working. It´s the price that has to be paid when being part of a herd.

The shadow of the age of pisces are lies, deception and sacrifice and a lot of people have deeply invested, to hold on to their illusional state.

For me it doesn´t matter anymore. I am bored by all the games and projections and I laugh about the comedy, that will only fool the ones that choose ignorance. I see the true colors and I see who refuses the wake-up calls. I see who wants to stay with the same old, sacrificing others for the own illusional comfort, thinking this will prevent themselves. I see who preaches love´n light and hides the own shortcommings in the shadows, holding everyone else accountable. There´s just one question, that is immediately making the house of cards crumble:

“Why do you hand your responsibility to people that are not even able to be responsible for their own actions?”

Being the scapegoat turned out to be the best role in that comedy. It made me strong and independent to be casted out so often. I had to learn to care for myself. And I prefer it meanwhile. Who wants to be part of such a kind of communities? Not me. The age of aquarius will be the time when free beings and equals are coming together and nothing else suits me. It is the point of view I can offer to all that have experienced to be the outcast. You are not meant to cuddle into the mold of the common lies, you are called to be sovereign, free and search only for company of your own kind. You deserve to be the ones to build the new earth.

It only hurts, when you try to herd. So just don´t. Be yourself and people that are attracted by your authentic self will find you. Quality over quantity. Dare to shine your light, integrate your own shadows and don´t care about others projections and lies. Life is way too beautiful for such games <3

 

Facing darkness

As I´ve announced I will write a bit more about shadow-work, as it is crucial at the moment. And Jupiter entering Scorpio tomorrow will bring up a lot of opportunities to face, what has been hidden and denied. I´ve been at an esoteric conference in Basel the last weekend and was very pleased to see that a lot of the invited speakers are not afraid of shadow-issues. I wrote a while ago about the new generation of teachers and yes, they are very real, down to earth and entering  the big stages more and more.

Who enters the earthly realm has to face duality. There´s no way to avoid it. Those that think to be out of that game have a blind spot. When you´re out of the game, you´re not in the arena, but you are here 😉  If you bring in your light, you´ll have to face darkness. All we can do is to be aware and to choose wisely.

I must have a nice light as I had to face a lot of darkness, coming my way. Darkness seldom came “right in my face”, mostly it came as a hidden enemie or as a loss.

For those that are familiar with astrology: I have a 12th house Capricorn sun and the ruler of Capricorn, Saturn, is in my 2nd house in Aries and squares my Sun. Lots of work and hardship, without material security – but lots of hidden enemies on top of it. At the moment Pluto, the helldog, plays with this constellation. I understand that I had to face hidden darkness, as I´ve been hiding my light. I have been badly paid, as I didn´t dare to insist in being paid well, as what I have to give is of value. So things are changing under Plutos influence. So thank you darkness for all your lessons, you are seen and valued for it.

When we are young and darkness shows up, we think this happens to us, we will tend to see us as victims and will try to fix things on the level where they show up: on the outside. When we get older, we understand that whatever occures on the outside, just does so, to stirr us up on the inside.

We are all at the moment in an epic battle between light and dark. Just the way it shows up in our lifes is a bit different, depending on the lessons we have booked when planing our incarnation. Do not get fooled, you´ll win or loose that battle on only one place: Your own heart.

Darkness did everything it could, it throwed everything at me that it had in this lifetime. It broke my heart a million times, it overtook all that I love, including my mother and husband. When team dark overtook my husband, the Repto-Lord that owned him, materialized for my very eyes and grinned into my face. Darkness wanted me to know its power. Yes, darkness brought up an ocean of tears and unbearable pain inside of me. I had periods of deep sadness. But I understood that they can only overtake what is theirs. But I am not and will never be. They can turn people that I love into hidden enemies, (using their hidden dark feelings like greed, envy or jealousy) but they have not the power to take my Love. And their power over their slaves is temporary, but my love for their eternal being knows no end. They took the lifes of people I love, but delivered just a direct line behind the veil to me. Darkness wanted to bring me down, but I´m a stubborn Capricorn, so I made darkness serve me in the end, always. Alchemy of the Soul. Darkness can take my material belongings, but who cares, as long as I own myself. Burn down my house and I find my real home. They can make me the scapegoat, they can abandon me or throw stones at me. I stay untouched in the light of my soul and nothing that is made of an illusion can destroy what is eternal.

I have a seventh house virgo moon. I am highly sensitive to others energies and emotions, while I see and understand very clearly the reason for their feelings. To be able to do my work, my heart has to be an open gate. When someone I love throws hate at me, I can feel it over any distance. Brought me literally to my knees a few times. But couldn´t break me, but purified me. When we are touchable by dark, we still have a shadow not faced inside of us, an aspect not fully integrated. I understand that. So I do not answer darkness with darkness. I turn it around and throw my Light on anyone crossing my path. And those that work against me, get an extradose of Love, as they need it the most. And it works. Darkness runs from me. Of course the running ones told the witnesses, that they can not stand me, as I am the bad girl. Scapegoating and projection. Works, again and again. Well, sorts out the weeds and weaks out of my field, so thank you again.

Darkness played its twisted games so long, that the maincharacter and his many expressions got mad, lost in the game and forgot that it is just a role. Lucifer has been the highest of the angels and he had forgotten, that he is an expression of the divine creation. His role has been to teach through diversity. But he has identified with his role, he believes to be the almighty god and he is a jealous one. He is dependent on worship and when you do not feed him he gets totally angry. You have to fall on your knees and obey to him. And I don´t. He´s just another actor on this divine stage. I honor him and I even love him, as he is my divine brother. Not more, not less. Darkness (Lucifer) has in its core never left the omniverse, where all is in harmony.  And our essence is still there. Darkness is just a way energy is expressed. Darkness believes its polarisation to be more powerful, but its energy is just more raw.

Darkness even thought to own this planet. But I´ve got news for dark: Greetings from home, dear Brother, Lord Darkness, he who is not to be named. Mother Gaia owns herself. She´s married to Father Sky, but not even he owns her. He loves and enjoys her. Its divine love, it knows no distance and no end. You can try to poison Gaia, sell her, molest her as often as you want, you will never own her. Ownership is a joke. You´ve been allowed here, as she allows her children to make their experiences. You are not the ruler of this planet, of mankind or anyone. Rule over yourself, if you can! A wise mother allows her children to make experiences. Mothers that do not allow these, will never have adult children. And Gaia, as an expression of Sophia, is a very wise mother. So thank you dark, for this  lesson, you may now take your seat again. We´ve really enjoyed your show, but life has a few more aspects to itself. You are just a part of all that is.

What you send out comes back to you? Yes and no. When we refuse to answer hate with hate and fear with fear…we become the gamechanger. Team Dark thinks to be in control and invincible. And the reason why they could make eternal free beings their slaves is that everybody believed it, that´s why they worked for darkness at all. When they realize they are not in control and helpless against the power of light, that scares the hell out of them. Team dark runs because it is afraid that when the light wins it would pay them back, that the light would punish them, the same way they have punished the light. But only darkness believes in old testament justice, the light lives in grace.

See, team dark has given all they had, but all they did was to strenghten me. It´s all energy. It now returns to the sender – just a little bit transmuted. They are used to receive hate for sending out hate, that´s an endless self-feeding cycle. But when they receive light in return for darkness, that shows them who the gamechanger is.

And it is a game. There´s no such thing like duality in the heavenly kingdom. Shine your light dear Ones, it will protect you and others in these times of the big change!