Category: The New Earth

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Open and true communication

There seem to be so much communication going around, but when we take a closer look a lot of it is just noise. It is distracting, confusing and even creating division instead of understanding.

We do not use communication for what it was ment to be, to show ourselves truly, to exchange points of views and experiences, to than gain better understanding of “the other”. Instead we show a false persona and speak hollow words.

Instead of true communication we lie, cheat, manipulate, fool each other (and of course ourselves, as we try to convince ourselves very often through our talk). Why? Because we think we are not good enough. That we wouldn´t be accepted when we show ourselves truly and freely. We believe to be seen as weak or vulnerable when we really speak our truth.

Well, I find the opposite to be true. The more I am aware of my own strenght, the more I am able to be open. When something is needed in this time of masks and illusions than it is true, open communication.

Real communication brings us to a place where we are able to see what we might have in common and that leads to a union beyond our diversity. There is always much more we have in common with people, than what seperates us from them. Even enemies have often much in common: Their fear, their investment in lack-mentality, their longing for safety and their believe the other would prevent them from being safe and having enough.

People are afraid others wouldn´t respect them, if they knew their weakpoints. Well, when you allow yourself to show your true self you will respect yourself for your strenght and authenticity. If you respect yourself, your weakpoints stop being weakpoints, it is just the perfect imperfect way the divine shows itself through you. The ones that than turn their back on you, not allowing your honesty, have never been a real match. It is perfect that they run to worship another illusion, to distract them from their own vulnerability. You want people that love you for who you are, and they are not able until now.

Someone told me lately that I would be too open, that I would expose myself, when talking about childhood trauma or about having had an ailment. That as a healer, teacher and a living Rose I should be an example of the divine and therefore be the best I can be. Well, I had a good laugh. Cause that is what I am. Being aware of my divine self, although I was abused as a child or having myomas. I chose that path, to be as divine AND imperfect as everyone else. To show that we are always perfect in our imperfection. Always loved, no matter what happens and that we can heal ourselves, cause everything we need to overcome our obstacles is already within us and around us. Showing my perfect imperfections is the very best I can provide.

The new healer, teacher is not showing only one aspect of himself, the divine self, s/he is showing them all, cause the most important teaching and healing s/he is providing is the truth, that you have it all inside of you also. If they are imperfect humans, your imperfection is okay, if they are divine, you are divine.

True communication shows all that you have inside. Others will  compare notes and choose what is helpful for them. In this way we benefit from communication. We have fooled ourselves and others long enough. Time to get real, to really show up, to really exchange our knowledge and truth.

When people speak to me one-on-one they dare to be real, to speak their truth, show their weakpoints. They know they can trust me, because I have been through it all myself. I know darkness, that´s why I can hold the light. I am compassionate, not because I am more holy than they, but because I am human, just like they. We have to make peace with our human self to embody the divine self.

When there is nothing to hide, that´s how we truly shine your light!

The Choir of Energies – My calling


To me it is a beautiful, divine joke that I am gathering people for group sessions. I really love being on my own, as I am very sensitive to energies and easilys distracted by others energies. I love being in nature, as there every being is just following their flow, all is connected and itself at the same time. And that is my real magic, being able to perceive and feel that connection with all that is and in nature that feels great. With humans not so much usually. We are all more or less distorted as humans, we have lost this ability to be part of all that is and being ourselves at the same time.

But I remember how this feels like. I had a memory all my life, that didn´t seem to fit into this life and not even into my pastlifes. I remembered a place where I felt like a child sitting on a beautiful meadow, being totally happy, in peace and in love with all that is. I was connected in a very loving way with other beings, also living there, we had an inner awareness of the other. And than something horrible happened. Some of us went into a kind of cave (the soul thinks in pictures) and one being that was very close and dear to me, went into it and got lost. The inner connection was cut off. I reached out and couldn´t sense him. He didn´t answer. Another one went there to search for the first one, but the same happened. It felt horrible. And although the cave felt like really great danger, I couldn´t stand it to have no connection and not knowing if they are fine. So I went into the cave also, because I wanted to help them, but also out of curiosity and adventure. I knew it is dangerous, one could easily get lost, just like the others. The last thing I remember was pure blackness and horror. Welcome to planet earth and to a world where people do not know that they are one with all of creation. Where connection was made to dominate or manipulate and not as a natural expression of the own being.

2009 I met a guy named David Brown. He was from South Afrika and channeling Kryon, but more working with emotional topics like the Inner Child. I had started to write and thought about writing books and he told me that this is fine, but it would lead me to be “A Healer of Hearts”. I thought he is making jokes. But no, he insisted that this is my calling and what I came for.

2010 I listened to a guy named Alberto Villoldo, a medical Anthropologist and also a well known Shaman, as he was teaching what he learned from the Indigenious People. He said they were telling a tale about a heavenly meadow where we all have been living in harmony until a huge and beautiful angel came along and told about this earth and that people here need help. And some chose to come here and this are the lightworker. I stood there mouth open and thunderstruck when he told that story. How could a tribe in the Amazonas know my memory about the heavenly meadow? And well, I understood that I came here, cause even some lightworker had lost their inner connection with all that is. And of course I did also…just I had a precious memory, the ticket home, in my pocket when I came in.

When having my Initiation last year the prohecy of me being a healer of hearts came true. The Rose is all about Love and Compassion and these are the Masterkeys for any form of healing and well-being.

When 2017 started I was facing an interesting problem: How should I find time for all the people wanting to get to know the Rose or needing help and assistance, but couldn´t afford a private session? It wasn´t possible to help all and it didn´t feel right to exhaust myself, as I have to work at an office-job to pay my rent, I need time for my own evolvement and my writing work. When having a problem, we need to think totally outside the box. It seemed impossible to find a solution. So I asked  the higher self of a master-soulutioner: My own. I received very clear instructions: Bring together quantum healing and group sessions and dedicate one day every month totally to this work. Give no other free sessions, but take good care for yourself. So I gave the first group-session on january 7th, the evening before my birthday. Goodness, I couldn´t imagine what would take place, made me laugh and cry at once. Every month I learn more. The people that are gathering at a quantum level, all over the planet, are creating such an amazing choir of energies, that I couldn´t have imagined that in my wildest dreams. I´ve got the ability to connect with others through conciousness, the inner net, that is the precious gift of OneLove I brought in from our divine home. So I stretch my consciousness to all participants, gathering them at a quantum place outside of time´n space as we know it and they are all adding their energies to this choir of divine love. I know that this will be a new kind of energy healing on this planet. When science will be able to understand multidimensionality they will understand how we are all connected and such sessions will be very common.

One thing is also very important: One of my other gifts is to understand natural abundance. It is working like nature and like the choir of energies. Everyone brings in what s/he has and everyone receives what s/he needs. This is very difficult to understand with our cultural programming, cause all on the old earth was about energy feeding and stealing. When people loose their divine connection they are starving and therefore working with domination and manipulation to steal from others. All humans do that somehow. But when we learn to reconnect with our divine self this is no more needed, as we have access to endless energies.

I had people that didn´t dare to sign in for the monthly session as they didn´t want to take something when they can give nothing in return or they thought others might need the healing energy more. That is the old healing modality, but not what happens while the group sessions. When so many beautiful souls are connected with their divine self, there is more than enough as every participant is adding to a place of plenty and endless abundance. I started the monthly sessions out of love  for others and love for myself. This pure intend brings me back to the heavenly meadow, all connected to all, while being themselves. Thank you to all participants that are co-workers in bringing in the Choir of Love. It is really happening. We are bringing heaven to earth.

Keep on shining your beautiful light!

You don´t know what you don´t know

As the light is getting stronger, the things hidden in the dark show up. A lot of people make these experiences at the moment, where the unknown becomes known. It shows up, cause we are now ready to face it, transmute it…and change whatever is needed to be changed.

I´ve experienced with others and myself, that things that are unknown have an impact on the own biography and stop our evolvement. In my own family something my grandfather once had done and that burdened him with a deep feeling of guilt has had an  impact of sabotage on his own life and the generations to come.

We have to make the unknown known to stop the destructive repetitions. Cause they occur, no matter if we know about the cause or not. I didn´t think that there might be much unknown stuff in my own case. I have memories from really early childhood, from other lifetimes and even remember how I once chose to go to earth and why.

But there had been difficulties still showing up, that really didn´t make sense to me, especially when it came to relationships of any kinds. I attracted psychopaths. Although I seemed to have made all my homework, healed issues of abandonment, people-pleasing and whatever may have caused it, one really strange experience occured last year again. Just that I didn´t knew I had attracted distortion again, cause he´s a “spiritual” guy and everyone thinks him to be just wonderful. I realized one could really wonder what he was ful(l) with. It took me a long time and some hints from the lightforces and friends (as I couldn´t understand his mindset) to realize what had been hiding in the dark. After finding out I had a serious talk with my Higher Self, saying “Enough! I deserve better! Stop it!” It didn´t make sense to me. So, I´ve been shown what has caused my attraction of distorted, abusive people: Childhood memories showed up…out of the blue and really scarry, distorted and traumatic.

Our subconscious knows it all. We are on an energetic level like a computer, that is running a programm. And there might be a virus in our system, causing us serious harm. We have to look at it and transmute it, to change our energetic setup. We are all doing it at the moment, on a personal and collective level. Seems to be really hard sometimes, I´m the last one that would say that it is easy. But the future can not change, when we are not doing the work in the now.

One thing that I realized is, that the silencing has been one of the worst things about my own abuse and for many others. The people around, pretending to see nothing, just to keep their comfortable lifes or even benefit somehow. People that even blame the ones that would need support, care and their back up. Scapegoating, to not take responsibility for the own dark feelings, like guilt, fear, shame. And perpetrators, trying to “use” the situation to cause even more harm. The affected people are left alone and after a while stop to even ask for help. I´ve been talking with a woman of a help-organisation yesterday and she agreed it is the worst about all of it. So I chose to go out and write about it. I´ve been talking with the woman from the help-organisation about this decision of mine, also. She said, that it could indeed help myself, help others and is needed in society. But of course, when we expose ourselves we might be targeted also. But finally I decided: “I´ve been targeted so often anyway. This planet isn´t safe until the last child may sleep safe in his own bed, without experiencing rape or other forms of violence. I didn´t come to earth to be safe, I came to be a lighthouse, nothing less.” And while I type these words, Bob Marley starts to sing in my mind: “Get up, stand up.” So thank you for the heavenly support, brother of the light.

I have created a blog, that is in german, but has a translation button at the end of the page. If you are interested, just klick on the Link: The topic is abuse, its effects in my life and my path of healing. I know, that there will be people, that will dislike it, but I´ve gotta be myself and do not need anyones approval. Their judgement doesn´t say who I am, but who they choose to be. I have nothing to hide and nothing to fear, but secrets and darkness itself – and I don´t! They cannot exist where light and truth have taken reins.


Martyrdom is a misconception of the divine service

It took me a while to put this inner truth into proper words, but I hope I am now capable to do so, so you can understand my message and benefit from it.

Martyrdom has to do with guilt somehow and guilt is not a truth. Both are the result of a misconception. When we serve others out of that feeling to be somehow responsible for them, for their well-being or suffering, than we create an energetic distortion, as we act against divine truth. Martyrdom and guilt is the denial of the divine I AM of the others and their abilitity to create their reality.  When I see helpless creatures in them, people that are “less than” or if I deny my own divine self and see myself as “less than”, than the distorted idea arises that they have to save me or I have to save them. This energetic imbalance creates a point of view that is confused. It would mean that I would owe them, or they would owe me somehow. To do it for the other, because we think we have to “save” someone is never a good decision as martyrdom denies the divine self, the creator that exists in all of us.

I´d like to offer another option and point of view: Serve others, but do it for yourself, because it expresses who you are. Do it because it expresses your divine self.  I´m not a loving, compassionate and generous person because I have to or because I want to be a good person. That once used to be my intention, before I dared to be selfish enough to care about how I feel. And I want to feel good, in alignment with my divine core, therefore I do not try to force others to be who I want them to be – just the opposite: I am who I want to be, all else is not my business. I am free and they are free. And I choose more and more with whom I spend my time. Nothing is more important to me now but with whom and in what mood I spend the moments of my life. It´s an honour to spend time with me. Why? Cause I can be perfectly happy when being on my own watching the clouds move or the stars twinkle above me. I have found peace and happiness inside of me. I do not need to spend my time with someone. I do not need someone else to make me happy. When I´m with myself and with nature I am happy, in peace and harmony. So why would I spend my time with you? Because I care. Because I love you as you are another part of my divine self. I love this divine spark in you and I´d love  to see you thrive. But in case you want to suffer or play silly powergames, I am out. I will never again suffer in the name of love. I see you as free and I see myself as free. All else is too less for me.

I know that my mission here on earth is one of service. Cause being of service is actually divine. People still get that wrong. They treat people that are of service with disrespect, cause here on earth all values had been upside down. I always knew that. I knew that the highest position is those of a wo/man that is serving the people. Think about it: The ones that changed this planet for the better all have been humble somehow. They all served. And do not get me wrong. I may serve you, but doesn´t mean I will accept it, when you treat me somehow with disrespect. That´s the best way to make me enjoy the starlight or the singing birds on my own. In this case I´d decide I´d serve you best, when leaving you behind.

And that I chose to be of service doesn´t mean I can have no luxery, of course I can, who deserves it more but the ones that  came to earth to serve. I remembered all my life that I did so. I remembered the place where we had been individuals, but with a connected consciousness. I had this memory, but didn´t know what it meant. Now I know it is the future of mankind. I remember the horror when I went into the darkness to help people find their inner connection again, that they had lost. I decided to be of service. Not because I had to, but because I chose to. That´s not martyrdom, that´s honoring my and your divine self.

Shine your light, that´s what you came for!

The new New Age – Beyond black´n white

I never fitted in. The “normal” society thinks me to be really weird, although they know not more of my real life, as that I am using alternative medicine and that I meditate. That´s already strange enough for them, but that´s just as much as they can accept. They do not know that I´m working as an energetic healer, as their perception is limited and metaphysics is for them fantasy or deception. Well, when my new book is coming out in a few month, they´ll know it. Might cost me the job that is paying my rent, what feels quite uncomfortable to be honest. But I´ve gotta be me, no matter who likes it or not.

Well, I´ve also never fitted into the New Age Community. I´ve been drinking coffee long before Lee Carroll and Geoffrey Hoppe made that acceptable. I´m wearing black very often, and often with intense colors on it, as black makes them even more shiny, I love that. I´ve been criticized  so often by the ones believing that wearing white would make them purer and better than me. For sure they need to be. Well, Paulo Coelho and Gregg Braden do also prefer black mostly, but noone would criticize them, cause they are famous. Others gossiped because of my overweight and the holy ones may be even more malicious as the normal folks. I´ve recognized it and could love them anyway, cause I know about their low self-worth, that needs to feel better than others. The New Age community often had just chosen other boxes, but until now not so many did really leave them behind.

Whenever I met those of ancient traditions, they never criticised my clothes or my overweight. The Shamans that crossed my path, whatever color they´ve been wearing,  spotted me in the biggest crowd, looked me in the eyes, smiled and nodded while passing by or layed their hand on the heart and bowed. They do not need to be right or better, they know their own I AM, so they can with ease honor mine.

I do also not fit in spiritual groups, as I enjoy the teachings, but sooner or later I will mirror the oppressed shadow of the guru aka teacher, and who wants to see and transmute that? I´ve been an invitation to be whole, instead of playing holy, but they normally chose other and that´s fine for me now. It used to make me feel lonely. But I found out that I´m in good company when being with me and that I will not pay the prize to sell myself, just to be accepted in someone elses box. I´m living in a city near the frontiers to france and switzerland and that mirrors my being, as I´ve always loved diversity. I´ve danced to “Highway to hell” so wild and joyful every devil would´ve felt his forgotten heart and I prayed for the peace of this world with the devotion of an angel and to me that´s not been a polarity, but life unfolding naturally.

I didn´t fit in, cause I represented the shadow, the very thing that society oppressed. The unwanted. But the treasure is in the shadow, as this is what makes us whole again. The normal society suppressed the magic of life. And the wanna-be-holies they´ve suppressed all they assumed as “not holy”, as its been too profane for their holy butts, producing only unicorn-poo.

I do not want to fit in anywhere no more, I came to go beyond it. I am the one knowing that all is holy. The dirt of the earth is divine, a Rocksong may be disturbing, or express the joy to be alive…it´s up to you, what you do with it. I´m going beyond black´n white. I´m the new New Age, as beloved Suzana named it yesterday in one of her many genius moments.

The new New Age is inclusive. It´s not denying the magic and it doesn´t wanna escape in Ivory Towers. I was 20 years old, when I stated: “Going into the Himalaja and getting enlightened is easy. Do it in everydays life, that´s a bit more challenging.” We didn´t come to escape this earth. We wanted to change her, through us. Not by building new boxes.

The wind that is playing with my hair, the sun kissing my rosy cheeks, the child coming along and exchanging smiles with me, the cat on the street, the coffee in my cup, my huge buddha-belly, the bird in the tree and the drunk homeless, they are all holy. Nothing of it is less, as all has the divine in it, otherwise it wouldn´t exist.

The new New Age goes beyond black´n white…it is colorful, just like life itself. I did not write this article to offend anyone, I´ve just expressed myself. I do not need likes, I do not need followers and I do not need approval. But I´ve gotta be me, in all my perfect imperfection. The ones that are my tribe understand that, the rest may do whatever pleases them, they are just as free as I am, shining my light and enjoying theirs.


The transformed warrior

The warrior-energies have brought forth so much pain, destruction and distortions on  this planet, that they have been shunned and shamed totally. But as an astrologer and alchemist of the soul I know that every energy might be expressed in a constructive or destructive manner. So I looked for transformation and found it.

The warrior energies are living within me. I´ve had many lives as a warrior, but as the female side has been deeply wounded by the distorted warrior, I have had trouble with accepting these kinds of energies inside of me. But when I did, it brought huge changes into my life and anchored peace in my heart. And as a beautiful, wise old soul told me lately, my compassion is rooted in these experiences as a warrior, what really made sense. I know I´ve been it all myself, so there´s a deep understanding arising out of these lessons.

In I´ve described that I´ve stopped my own inner war by marrying these both sides of me: my female side has much of a young maiden, she is shy, poetic and innocent. And my inner male side is deep, tough and powerful. Well, together they bring forth my actual persona.

In the past I really had trouble  to accept the warrior energies. I know I´ve done a lot in other lifetimes that is horrible. Inacceptable for my inner female, that´s been deeply hurt by such actions. But I loved the inner male, the warrior, anyway. It´s my nature to love, no matter what. And that changed him, it transformed the warrior. He went inwards, no more fighting against this world, but standing up for own values. Her values of love. They became  the Knight and the Lady, deeply devoted to their united soul path. The transformed warrior is standing his ground. Never giving up, never giving in. The reason why I am writing about it is, that we will need these energies. The transformed warrior has the power of 300, invincible. It is not enough to sing a song and believe in unicorns to change this planet. It really needs much badass braveheartedness to go for the own transformation and to really change deeply.

You will find how this is also the way to generaly heal the male energies on this planet, that are deeply wounded, distorted and feel abandoned and ashamed of themselves. Love, unconditional love will help the male energies to find their inner core and strenght again. The new earth is not only the goddess rising …it is also the unity and cooperation between male and female.

Shine your brave warrior/goddess light!

The son of god is a Master, not a Martyr

One of the most misleaded concepts of the Age of Piesces is that of  a suffering Healer or of Christ as a Saviour.

Noone can save someone else, nor has s/he the right to do so. The free will of each soul is a given. To think we have to save one would go totally against this law of attraction/creation in this galaxy. It is this law that makes out of the human a god himself, a creator. To keep humans away from this knowledge was the true deception of darkness. And even the evil forces had to follow that law, that is the reason why they needed to install a system to brainwash people and to deceive and manipulate them. They´ve stretched this law to the max on this planet, but did all they could to ensure humans wouldn´t find out that they can leave their prison cells. Yeshua Ben Joseph has been a Renegade, not only against the political or religious system, but against all systems that enslaved mankind. That he is the son of god, just alike all of us, that we are free creators has been the true message of the man the dark forces nailed to the cross. And they maliciously turned his message around and even made a true Master a symbol of suffering and victimhood. What a lie!

They misused the humans ability for compassion and empathetic feelings to keep us on our knees. And we think that this is ok, as even Jesus carried the cross. Do not buy that! He showed that we have to fear no earthly forces, as we have the eternal life.

Martyrdom is the shadow aspect of the age of piesces and the totally distorted message that occured out of the crucification of Jesus. I do not want to hurt anyones religious feelings, so I apologize for that, but please recognize that a hanged man on a cross had hurt my feelings, thoughts and inner knowledge all of my lifes for many, many centuries.

How can we worship torture? Yeshua Ben Joseph did not die for our sins, he lived to free our minds from slavery. That is a message that I have to write on this Easter, that also is Passover. He embodied the christ-consciousness and was born into the jewish culture. But no free spirit is bound by any religion. Most of his brothers and sisters, in all cultures, in all religions, are still slaves in their minds until today.

All that are working for the light can only offer an option. Who takes it and who doesn´t is not our business. As lightworkers we are just delivering this option. Endlessly. Not out of martyrdom, but in honour of our free will. With love, joy and compassion.

Shine your light!

The Inner Net

As my Monthly Rose Touch Session is taking place via the Inner Net I try to describe it, as far as I am able to understand it myself.

The very nature of it is quantum, multidimensional. Time and distance do not exist there. But although people can for example tune into a Rose Session later (and as we´ve found out also earlier), every session there has another “quality” and is very unique. There is “no time”, but the session in february has been very peaceful, while march had a huge storm of energies and data comming in.

It is our consciousness that is our device, and it is free will, intend, that makes us connect to each other or to gather as a worldwide group even. When forming a group every participant is adding his own energies, what is always creating a different “taste”.

How did I find out about the Inner Net? I somehow knew about it all my life, as I´ve been able to connect to others via consciousness. I can “tune-in” into their energy-field. Just I didn´t know what is going on and what is “wrong” with me. Nothing is wrong, I´m exactly what I am suppossed to be. Most of my life it happened “by accident” and brought some strange experiences. The day my former mother in law died, my ex-husband has been eating fried chicken and I knew it because I could taste it in my own mouth. When I heared my  stepfather had died, I could sense him around me. Not before, cause I didn´t “reach out” earlier. Having access to the Inner Net also is the reason why I sometimes “knew” things I couldn´t know. It´s been enough that someone somehow connected to me knew. I guess a lot of things that people see as spooky or haunted have to do with this multidimensional network between all consciousnesses. We are all having access to the Inner Net. Nothing about it is spooky. It is metaphysics, what is physics we do not know much about until now, but we will learn about in the future. The very fact that I am writing about it openly in the Internet and having sessions is proof that these things will be part of the “new normal”. But I also know that it has been known to the ancient mystery schools, that used it for communication and healing over distance. That´s why it is so natural to me, I´ve been trained for this work already in other lifetimes.

I´m doing something that is somehow new on this planet, gathering worldwide groups for healing over the Inner Net. But I “know” that we are pioneers to something that is going to be very normal on the “New Earth”. When common physics will find out about our consciousness and its impact on our lives it will be very normal to connect by intend.

Anyone who has to add something about this Inner Net is very welcome. Please share your experiences, so we all will find out more about it and will be able to work with it more precisely.

Sending a huge hug to my fellow-pioneers over the Inner Net 😉 <3

Shine your light, precious soul!


The picture you can see related to this article is an artwork of Merita Bat Shoshan. She painted a living Rose at her workplace and I really love that picture.

Letting go of judgement and resistance

Letting go of all judgement and resistance is a most important step on the own spiritual path, as far as I´ve experienced and witnessed it.

I see the very idea to know what is “the truth” as the original “sin” aka misperception of mankind. I even wrote a whole chapter about it in my last book. To me it is the beginning of all evil and darkness. Therefore darkness is relatively seen real, but not absolutely true. It is caused by a lack of understanding. When we resist what is and believe we know how things should be instead, we are starting a war in us, leading to a kind of mindsplit and all kinds of opposition, fight and war. As things aren´t “right” we get angry, frustrated, depressed, feel vulnerable, unworthy, guilty and so on. As we cannot stand it to feel that split, we create the shadow. And although we have created him, we are percieving him as something on the outside. We project him onto this world, although we are the ones that are in opposition to the light, to creation itself.

When we start to assume that whatever happens in our life leads to something good or has a hidden treasure in it, we start making peace with reality. I know that there are horrible things happening, but I know also that the involved persons don´t know better. “Forgive them, they don´t know what they are doing.” And that is nothing but true. The ones doing you wrong, think they are doing “the right thing”. Therefore stop judging them. Somewhere along your long path of incarnations you did the very thing you are judging now. Accept that you didn´t know better. That is also a very important step to be able to love ourselves. When we start to recognize that we´ve been it all, good and bad, rich and poor, old and young and that it was somehow necessary to become the person we are now, peace arises in ourselves. And how shall I judge someone else, when I trust s/he needs all the experiences that s/he chose? The more we evolve on our souls path, the deeper the insights are, the more is clear that the universe is always looking for balance. Behind all outer turmoil you´ll find a deep peace, love and compassion.

Embrace all of you and all of creation. Allow all that is, as it is go(o)d.  Seeing the world through this perspective, that´s a masters perception. It´s the end of suffering.

Shine your light and love your shadow, you cannot imprison him anyway!

How I fell in love with disappointments

A few weeks ago I was looking at the word disappointment and fell in love with that word and the truth it mirrors.

An appointment is made by two or more persons, that made an agreement. If one doesn´t want to follow these terms any more s/he should inform the other. Sounds simple, but in fact people are making promisses they never meant even for a second. I don´t like that, but I happily accept all disappointments of that kind, as I love to leave illusions behind. I´ve learned to watch the actions, instead the words and only want what is true.

When looking at the word disappointment I also had to realize that some people are disappointed all the time, while there has never been truly an appointment, just their expectations. They made up some rules in their mind, unspoken laws, that not only form their own prison, but also take all others around as captives. I have to admit that in my past I tried very often to spare people disappointments, cause I love having happy people around me. But I had to realize, that I cannot make others happy and that I have never openly been asked to agree on these terms and conditions. These illusionary appointments have only been made up in the others mind. I felt how I would never want others to do anything they don´t want to, so why do they expect me to do what they want? Cause their “love” has conditions and they only love me for fulfilling their wants and needs. So I am living true love when I disappoint them. True love is totally free. And I really don´t want people in my life, that give a sh*t on my wants and needs, as long as I serve theirs. I decided that I cannot accept these kind of relationships in my life, cause in fact these people cannot have a true connection to someone. They only listen to you, cause than you have to listen to them in return. They are traders, not lovers. They don´t love themselves and therefore you have to fill a void, that is caused by a deep feeling of lack. They need you to fulfill them, but in truth they are never fully satisfied. I saw so clearly how they never appreciate what you give to them, but only see what you didn´t. You can never make them happy and they will never truly be happy for long. Only true communion can do that. And they don´t want that, but instead they want a fake connection, shown by outer rules, signs and appointments. They´ll force you openly or with manipulative behaviour to prove how much you love them, even by harming yourself. If you do them a favour by not doing what is in your own interest, you prove your love. Don´t do that. They are not able and willing to have a true and free connection from heart to heart. It is in their and your own interest to not follow their rules and expectations. It is my pleasure to disappoint these kind of people, by only being available for the real deal. Nothing less!

All these unspoken rules, all these mental prison cells, make real connection and communion impossible. Real, deep communion is only possible when free people are connecting by free will, with open mind and hearts. But all these invented laws of behaviour make it impossible to really touch each other. People try to install safety with that, but it is the safety of a dungeon or graveyard instead of the trust that only occurs through the freedom of a love-connection, unfolding naturally.

So I ask you to follow your commitments as long as your heart wants to, but also dare to disappoint to destroy the prisons that keep us away from true love connections from the heart.

Shine your light!