Category: The EmPath

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Why the EmPath has to anchor within

Being an EmPath is for many a path of struggle, pain and exhaustion. When we feel everything around us so intensely, that´s just a massive overload, especially when we live in huge cities, meeting lots and lots of people every day.

Therefore it is absolutely crucial that we learn to master our special abilities. In my case my abilities have to do with “tuning into energy fields”, especially emotional energy fields. And this picture of “tuning in” is pointing out clearly how to handle all the energies.

Think of yourself as a radio. One that has not learned by now to choose the prefered station and lets all of them in at once. Plus it might have an issue with its ground wire.

When all radio-stations come in at once, that´s of course just a horrible noise. No wonder when an EmPath is depleated at the end of the day, feeling just stressed out. When I look back I really wonder how I´ve been able to survive under these conditions.

What helped me on my path was to finally realize that I´m able to choose the radio station. When I first heared of that idea I doubted that this is possible and you might feel the same reading this. But it really is possible, just it needs a.) your intend and b.) practise.

There are many tools out there, that help while that process. I personally chose some breathing technics from the Heartmath Institute, as they are very quick, easy and effective to use. Shamir Ladhani offers every monday a free 15 minutes session, the “Espresso Shot” for people to learn about these methods. It helped me to learn to anchor within myself, what is crucial for all people at the moment, but especially for EmPaths.

When it comes to the intend you might stumble over an interesting point: You have to ask yourself, why you chose to open all channels at once. Of course it is somehow part of your being to be empathic, like being a cat or a human is a given and can not be changed. But when your skill is hindering you, makes you struggle even, than it is worth looking at it, how it comes that we overdo it so much. I know that this doesn´t seem like a conscious choice, but even our subconscious choices have a reason and can be changed. There might be a hidden benefit or belief behind it. I can not answer this for you, just share what I found out in my case. Maybe this inspires you or gives you a clue for finding out about your own reasons.

As I mentioned before I didn´t believe that I can have a say when it came to my empathic abilities. I couldn´t imagine, that I can learn to fine-tune them and so I just felt overwhelmed, without a choice. And that´s just not been true.

Another believe that I had, one of my reasons why I lived with all channels open at once, has been that in my childhood I had to be constantly alert, as I´ve been raised in a dangerous environment. I realized that this had imprinted me with the idea to live in a dangerous world, that needs constant attention on my surrounding.

Another obstacle was the strange idea to be somehow responsible for the well-being of the people around me. Many EmPath have that, those on a spiritual path especially. I will explore this topic deeper in an upcoming article, but for todays topic it is enough to realize that this is one of the misperceptions, that cause an EmPath to focus on the outer world, to prioritize “the other”.

When you found out what is the hidden benefit or belief that causes you to overdo your beautiful talent, you can feel into it and decide if the benefit is really worth it and if your beliefs are helpful for your path.

As many EmPath struggle with it, they do not know that they have an option to learn to handle their gifts and still serve mankind.

In my own case I found out, that I serve mankind best when I learn to anchor within myself. Therefore I had to learn to make my own well-being and groundedness my top priority. The reason for that has been my Monthly Rose Touch. I had to understand that  I have to be fully anchored within myself to be able to hold a stable connection to the participants all over the world.

It´s been common sense that made me avoid distractions as much as possible each month while that special day. It didn´t make sense at all to allow someone to challenge my serenity, when dozens people would benefit from my balanced state while the Rose Touch. So I stayed with myself most of that day, to not have outer distractions. And that worked out so well and I benefit so much from it, that I learned to take that centered attitude into the rest of my life.

Fact is, that I always knew how peace, love, harmony feels like, that´s my “home station”. That´s the real gift I brought in. I guess most of the EmPath know how home feels like, that´s why they get stressed by the dissonnant noise here. Fact is also that I came to send out this station, for sure I did not enter this life to instead loose myself in others disharmonious vibes.

What helps anchoring and grounding? Being in nature, meditation and all kinds of arts help me to ground and focus and I know a lot of EmPaths that enjoy these relaxing activities, too. But you have to find out what suits you personally. All I share is just to inspire you to find your own truth.

And I can tell you that the more you practise to fill your cup first, the more you are able to become an overflowing fountain. And that´s what an EmPath is as his/her highest potential. A fountain of Love, Joy and Compassion.

You are precious and much needed in this world. Please treat yourself with much honor, love and respect. That includes to not allow others to feed off you or to bring you down. You help no one when you allow those destructive behaviours, may it be you towards yourself or by allowing outside sources to mistreat you.

When you follow that path you´ll be more and more able to be resilient towards outer influences. But you have to go inwards to be able to go outwards. You have to first take care for yourself. And then inspire others to also take care for themselves. In this way we´ll co-create a world of happy, fulfilled people.

Shine your precious Lovelight.

If you´ve injoyed this article and would like to learn about “Energetic Boundaries“, the recording of a NeuSpace Conversation about that topic might be also helpful for you.

Showing up

Lately there’s been a whole lot of showin´ going on. This is the review.

The Master watches it all and has fun. I recognized how some tried to sneak around without showing themselves. Some showed a lack of understanding, compassion and honesty, be lie ving to be able to not be seen for who they are. Some tried to steal the show, others tried to prevent it. Life’s a stage and the roles and characters have been really interesting. A Master just recognizes timing and acting, while staying neutral and never getting really hooked into the mirrors and fogs, that fill the scenery. All kinds of characters showing up, changing names, changing games and still staying the same.

I realized how even a facebook account can be seen as a kind of scary Rocky-Horror-Picture-Show, while I just had fun, doing the freeing TimeWarp with my Brothers and Sisters. Others believed to be part of a childrens fairy tale, never realizing that little red riding hood is sended into the woods to catch herself a wolf 😉 Way too innocent to fall for an enchanted prince charming. And some are so blinded by the light of their own importance that they missed the whole show, when Candyland got blown up, because of a nice twist in the script. Different points of views…one play.

Others believed the show is an opportunity to get fed and not be seen for what they are. Well virtual popcorn has been served. A plastic Rose even proudly and openly stating to have been sended by her master to have an eye on me, not realizing she´s been just showing her chains and dishonor, while the spells of the black magic woman just felt off the abused that very night. Others trying to return to the light, without having to take ownership for their actions. And some did and have been welcomed. Silently, behind the scenes.

Why did all of that happen? Because the Masters had shown up for a showdown, that’s been noticed by just a few, but the outcome is going to be legendary.

One can not come close to a master and still believe to not be seen by the lasersharp light of consciousness. A Master has a lot of compassion and might even dance with a few shadows and demons, as s/he´s afraid of no-thing  and always able to have fun…but finally people have to realize what they caused, by standing in their own way and mostly harming themselves. Well, some go on the painful journey to embrace their shadows and become whole again by letting go of all they are not and some just go on another run, hoping to never have to face their own creation again… good luck with that one.

A Master is totally unimpressed by demons, angels and all kind of roleplay, always seeing  the eternal light behind the masks, as this has been the own game/creation for such a long time and some favorite plots been just reoccurring. And what has it been all about?

To quote myself at the beginning of our threesome quantum healing event: “We´re not here for the show. Of course we did show up and might show how it’s going, but we´re not here for the show, but for the people.” The participants have been co-workers, by the intent of their Souls, each representing a special form of abuse/energetic split, that’s been searching for healing and wholeness…I bow before the souls that chose to be a representative for humanity. You are greatly honored, as you have honored yourself. It took quite a few hours until it’s been in the field of the collective consciousness. When the download into the grid finally took place it almost blew me out of my physical body, but I couldn´t care less, I´ve been blessed and overly happy to see we made it. And it´s been noticed already, although the ripple effect might need quite some time in many cases. And of course not everyone chooses freedom. Some love their chains just too much to leave the SM-Showroom of Master and Servant, still waiting for their personal Jesus out of the Astral Illusionary Show instead of mastering themselves.

This article goes out especially because of the many, many Souls who have been coworking that will never stand in the spotlight of the earthly realms, but who did so much for so many for so long. I know it´s not been easy, but we chose it with intend and hereby changed the whole game. We prepared with much Love and Com/passion and the eternal stage gets standing ovations for this masterly play. Nothing else matters. Shine your light…for real, not for the show 😉

Make sure that nothing harms you, even if it did harm you

Yesterday I´ve been speaking with someone about painful experiences in my childhood. When I recognized she was feeling bad, just out of her beautiful ability to have empathy, I immediately told her to please change her point of view. That I wouldn´t be the person I am without these experiences. And that it is really not an easy path, but that it made me compassionate, strong and independent, so all is well. Make sure that this goes also for you. Make the bad stuff strenghten you, so you will thrive, no matter what.

The hard thing about being abused as a child was that I still attracted abusive people. The hard thing about having a covert narcissist as a mother was the energetic imprint, that would attract people, pretending to be loving and kind…that would than turn out to be covert narcissists. And that they are even existing in the spiritual community. But makes sense of course, it´s way too yummy for the wolfs to not go where their supply hangs around. And as Matt Kahn once said, there´s nothing worse than a spiritual narcissist.

All of these experiences are just painful, as long as we allow them to hurt us, without getting the benefit out of it.

I don´t know how you see it, but one thing that did hurt me was a feeling of imbalance and the idea of “that´s not  right that they get away with it and maybe even harm more people”. Well, drop it, actually they don´t. Noone escapes him-/herself on the long run. Noone is seeding without reaping, but it´s none of your business. Just take care of your own seeding and harvest. If you would stay in pain and misery, the Law of Attraction had to bring more pain and misery. Choose something better instead. Cause you can bring in balance for you, and you are only responsible for you, when you bring in a benefit to balance the harm.

An example: Someone told me a story, to get my attention, time, money. Although I felt something was weird I gave them what they wanted. Should I feel hurt when I recognized they tried to use me? Or instead say: I paid for the lesson to next time listen to my inner voice and to learn to say “no” ?! I chose the last point of view. When the same scenario happened to me lately the other got my “no” and than tried to manipulate me, accuse me, said mean things to bring me down. Didn´t hurt me at all. He showed his true colors, not mine. I laughed my ass off. Nice try.

A lesson learned doesn´t really hurt any more. There might be an echo, like a story from a pastlife, but not more.

But do not deny your own feelings of anger or pain. They have a message for you, they show you something that is not the truth of your soul. Just do not  linger in these feelings, when they have delivered their message. Anger for example might carry the message: “I am not a victim!” or “I want this situation changed!” And that is true, but there´s no need to harm someone else to prove that point. Use your anger, that is compressed energy, and let it unfold in something constructive. Clean your house or run a mile or two. Compressed energy is like fuel, use it to move forward and do not lit a candle, because you are a lightworker, and make it finally all explode 😉

There´s always something beautiful we can find even in our darkest experiences. Having made so many experiences with abusive people crossing my borders and not respecting my free will, made sure I am very careful when working with other people to make sure to respect their free will and serve them in the best possible way. My abilities of tuning into others energy field could be very easily misused and I met those, that misuse their own abilities to get what they want. And it´s the reason why some people, that are hungry for power, wanted me in their team. Just it didn´t work, as even the best masks fall one day and than the game´s over. I search only the power over myself. That´s more than enough to master. Instead of overtaking others, I assist them to be whatever they choose. And that really rocks!

My empathy makes sure, that I couldn´t harm someone without harming myself. And we all do harm us when we harm others, just an empath feels it immediately, while a narcissistic personality might never realize she did cause it all herself.

Oh, by the way, to give you a practical hint: Covert narcissists are really sneaky and often pretend to be empaths, too. Well, they might be very good actors, but only concerned when it comes to their own feelings. You can hurt them with laughable things like not having given them a like on Facebook or not having given them a call the last week. But they are really only sensitive when it´s about them. They never ever think compassionate about someone else or about the harm they are creating in other peoples lifes. They give a shit when it comes to other peoples feelings…and if you are an empath you have to learn to be a bit more like them. Just 1% to be able to kickass if needed. I never thought this would be what I´d learn in between lightworkers, but funny enough that´s been one of my most important lessons.

Become an alchemist of the soul and find something that serves you in every experience. A lot of my work as a Soulutioner is about this, to assist my clients to find the point of view that helps them to move ahead. When you find the benefit in a situation, you suddenly feel a positive feeling like clarity, freedom or peace. That´s your indicator, that you made it. What you feel is the energy of balance, that is regained. You need no excuse of the other to find peace, balance, healing. It is all taking place inside of you. That´s an important step for mankind to realize you can move on, no matter what the other is doing or not. You do not need someone to say sorry, to be healed. You hold your own power to find balance, healing, harmony.

It needs two to make war, it needs one to be at peace.

May this article help you, may you thrive and shine your light <3

Photo: Flowering shadow 😉

The EmPath and his relationships….with narcissists

All in the universe is looking for balance. The Empath is the universes answer of a world full of  narcissistic Psychopaths. Like magnets these two extreme types of personalities are dragged to each other. Mostly this is ending in pain, vain and tears, until we learn the lesson.

Mankind in general is until now in a child-like state of consciousness. We are trained to believe that someone else has to fullfil our wants and needs and is to blame when things aren´t going well. In this playground-scenario the little narcissist is the sandbox-bully and the little empath the nice kid, that is always bullied and therefore sweet, but in tears most of the time. Of course these are clichés and in real life we see many variations, but the cliché helps to paint the picture.

The point is that an empath is feeling other peoples emotions and he gives priority to the well-being of others. Believing that other peoples happiness will lead to his own fullfilment. Well somehow, in a very twisted way, that fits with the narcissist, who knows only one priority: His own well-being, believing the whole world has to care about him. And when you fullfil his wants and needs he can be quite charming, but the tiniest thing can also turn him into a monster. Well, together they both have been forming the normal disfunctional relationship on planet earth. The empath has been the caring part, trying to fullfil everybodies needs and desires, but often becoming unhappy, cause his own needs have not been met by the others. Their counterpart has been demanding in some way, making the rules, claiming attention and admiration. If someone doesn´t obey, he´s been punished in some way. Often by rejection, abandonment or by trying to awake feelings of guilt within the empath, who than tries even harder to please the narcissistic person. That´s the most common relationship pattern of the empath. Not only when it comes to partnering, but also with family, friends or co-workers.

As I am an empath myself and therefore know that dynamic just too well, I discribe how important it is to leave this destructive pattern behind out of the empath point of view. Until now I have not met narcissistic people, who really wanted to change. Of course they pretend they will, but they don´t really mean it. It´s just part of their game. Why should they change at all? If their life falls into pieces they blame everybody else and try to re-gain their power over you through manipulation. And in case that isn´t working, they´ll look out for the next empath to energetically feed off.

The moment when we realize that pattern, we might get sad or angry. But you don´t have to, cause realizing the pattern is already the way out. There´s also no point in blaming others or yourself. Just leave your pattern behind, that´s all.

Please understand that both involved personalities are the different side of the same coin, as they are created the same way, through a difficult childhood, where they didn´t receive true love. And true love, for themselves, is the real so(u)lution for both, to leave the repetition-mode behind. I wrote about it a while ago: The cursed children.

Here are a few points that might help the Empath:

  1. Take care for yourself like you take care for everyone else you truly love. Become your own lover, friend, child. I know it is not easy, but it will turn out to be really fun and joyful.
  2. Take time for yourself. Make sure you have top-priority. In case you never find time, make an appointment with yourself. And do not miss it for someone else!
  3. Fill your cup first. Activities many empaths enjoy to fill their batteries are: being in nature, listening to music, creating arts or to take time for wellness treatments.
  4. Breathing-technics or meditation to center within themselves are very helpful for empaths. When you are anchored and aware, others can not steal your energy that easy as they used to.
  5. Understand that if you are stable and joyful, you´ve got way more to give. Self-care has an important, positive effect, also on your environment.
  6. Trust in others, that they are capable. If they are not challenged they can not grow. Sometimes the best help is no help.
  7. Fixing other peoples issues is easy…caring for the own is more difficult. Stop distracting yourself with other peoples stuff. Face your own issues.
  8. Only help others, when they ask for it. And stop helping them, when they do not value it. Why? Out of respect for others and yourself.
  9. Surround yourself with other empathic people, cause they can understand you and you will do each other no harm, but you´ll cheer each other up.
  10. Feel loved by a higher source. When the divine loves you, cares for you, than there´s no reason to not do the same for yourself also.

I remember that I´ve been visiting a seminar of Shamir Ladhani in the first days of 2016. When I asked him what to do as an empath to not be so drained, he answered that I have to listen to “my own song” instead of the noise of this world. I felt a bit frustrated, cause I knew he was right, but I didn´t know how to get there. 1,5 years later I can state that it is still not always easy, but that I have made a huge progress. I can assure you that to listen to the own song is really key. Empathic people have so much to give, make sure to be an overflowing fountain and not a muddy puddle.

Please stay away from all toxic relationships. This is something I had to learn the hard way myself. It is so easy for me to love and I want all people to thrive, so I attracted the wrong people (they are not really wrong, cause they are the right ones to train us out of our pattern). But even when I recognized this pattern, I still had another obstacle. I have high standards and insisted that I have to be able to deal with the difficult people. That´s been nonsense. Please don´t do that to yourself! If you are too sensitive for a bully, than just stay away. If someone else is drinking poison (acting out destructive), why  should we join that person? To prove how strong we are and how much we love them? If we love them and us, we break the pain-chain. When we want to prove our strenght, we shall use this strenght to walk our own path. It´s not easy for an empath to not get effected by the feelings of their surrounding, but we didn´t come here to suffer with others. When we get affected or even infected by others feelings, that´s not helpful for anyone. Train yourself to listen to your own beautiful song and make sure to not weaken yourself and to not spend too much time with difficult people.

An empath is a very precious thing. This world needs people that are able to feel love and compassion. We came to send out high vibrations, to infect this world with love, not to be dragged down by those that enjoy destruction. Spend your energy in things and people that are constructive.

Shine your empathic light!

 

 

The EmPath: Why we can not carry someone elses cross

My own shadow-aspect has been very much entangled with my empathic abilities and my love for humanity. As I can feel others imbalance and pain, I often tried to help them, out of a misunderstood longing for harmony and love. I want all people to be happy and joyful. Therefore I took their stuff onto me very often. Or allowed them to project their issues onto me. But it´s never been working out, as we can not carry others burdens and can not spare them their lessons, which they need to learn themselves.

Sometimes I see that others are not ready for their lesson and therefore stay silent when I should speak up. I know the other can not, or doesn´t want to, make the next step. As all resistance is causing pain, I see how the outcome will hurt them, so I tried to stay silent and help them carry their stuff. But truth can not be held back and being a martyr for love helps noone. When we carry other peoples cross, they do not evolve. And sooner or later the moment always came, when I realized my unhealthy behaviour and claimed they might take back their burden. Well, they´ve never been thankful, but instead blaming me for hurting them and accused me to create their cross. So whom did I help on the long run?

I had to realize that in most cases I agreed to help people that have almost no empathy and therefore compassion at all. As the empath is representing one extreme side of a dualistic game, he attracts the other extreme, people that have narcissistic tendencies. They want others to take the hardship onto them, while they might use the high-horse. We serve noone as long as we do that and agree to play this game of duality. They need their own cross to evolve and we, as the empaths, should care for our own stuff and make ourselves happy, not others. No matter if you are more on the empathic or narcissistic side of the equation, both have the same lesson to learn: self-love.

Noone can do that for us. So love yourself. No matter who you are or where you are on your path, love is the only question, option and answer.