Day: February 18, 2018

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Healing the fe/male distortion

It´s the biggest tragic-comedy of all times. The fe/male split, expressed by so many heart-breaking stories. Different names, faces and places, all playing out endless variations of the same story.

Do you know what men search? (Yes, I know sex, the orgasm…but what is an orgasm, but total unity and melding of sorts?). What is it that makes them so intrusive? It´s the longing for total acceptance through the surrender of the feminine. Being themselves and being admired for their being. That´s why they always have to “be the best”, as only than they will be adored and experience the female surrender.

And what does the feminine look for? For admiration, of course. She wants to be adored for her worth. That´s why women wear absurde things and torture themself to be beautiful enough to be admired and “wanted”.

And that´s why men pay women for sex. To make her accept him, and may it be for 3 minutes behind a trash-can. And she will give it to him, cause the pennies she collects prove her beauty.

In most cases what is called a lovestory are two people, that feel lack, coming together to heal lack. Codepency. That´s why there is so much drama in our Love-Stories. We fight with the other, so s/he gives us, what only we can hold for ourselves.

We might play all kinds of drama on the outside, but they all are a reflection and projection of our own inner Story. The hide and seek, the hunt and withdrawal are just the externalization of the fear of surrender towards the own inner unity and melding. Pretending to search for Love that is unavailable, to distract from the refusing of the own inner ultimate melding and union. As long as we do, the show must go on on the outside.

A man who doesn´t love and value himself enough to feel safe, will never be able to give a feeling of safety to the women he chooses. So they will never feel valued or trust him and open up fully. Instead they will learn to behave more male around him, to not get overtrumped.

A woman who has not found her selfworth will never find the one who will give her the feeling to be worthy. No matter how many flowers she receives or how rich her husband is.

All that we search in the other is what we have abandoned in ourselves. We just externalize it, project it on the outside and create these unbelievable tragedies, comedies and crimescenes that we call Lovestories.

And also on the collective level it is just the sum of all the individuals, that are struggeling with their not integrated “other half”. I used to fight against authority figures, when I was younger, until I realized I am my own ultimate authority. I do not have to fight patriarchy, just give them a “no” once in a while, when they do not pay me the respect that they want from me also. And the rising of the feminine? It is true. Women take back their power. But this will not work out by fighting the male, that they carry within themselves, too. Don´t blame “the other”, become responsible yourself.

Why fight with a guy in a relationship or on a global scale with men about my worth? I love my own inner male and female aspects totally. I became a tender loving badass, able to deal with every guy coming along my way. If they can not handle me, that´s where they are not complete within themselves. Has nothing to do with me.

And that´s it. When I see how women still try to please men I know they are still codependent. And a guy running after a woman, still not knowing he is worthy all the love and beauty of this world. And holds it within himself, not needing anything from anyone. Just alike the woman that searches for Love in all the wrong places, as she is not loving herself without any compromise.

We have to become complete within us. You can not become a master and not have healed your inner split. Start the most awesome Loveaffair with yourself, including all of your aspects, male, female and child. Become your own holy family. Your aspects have to be integrated within yourself, then you are absolutely whole and complete and will be free to react on the outer world just as you choose to.

You have no idea how adorable these beings are, may they have a male or a female body, that own all of their being. Beautiful beyond words, no matter the looks. That´s how we were created. Breathtaking awesome. Return to it.

Shine your eternal, integrated Lovelight <3

Integrity

To gain integrity it is necessary that you don´t give a f*ck. Cause when you can get compromissed by anything or anyone, you will.

To gain true integrity you have to become totally free and sovereign. A long journey it has been in my case. Like many of my kind I´ve been tourchured and killed so often, everything that I love has been taken from me and every dream I have had has been shattered into pieces a million times. It had to. To become free of all of it in this lifetime.

And you have to become free with a totally open heart, that feels all the pain, all the losses, all the doubts, all the fears….and still loves absolutely relentlessly. That´s how you gain compassion and wisdom.

I have had close relatives dying in my early childhood and lovers been taken from me under tragic circumstances. The ones that I loved and trusted have abandoned and betrayed me. I´ve been scared half to death by big money and I´ve been standing at my own grave from a pastlife in 2016 to then die alive in 2017. It teached me that I am eternal and all my loved ones are too. Nothing ever happened to me or to them. We are save and eternally in love with each other no matter what happens.

I´ve been offered money, love, importance and the false light. And I chose the I AM, not an outer source of fullfilment.

So in case you have experienced similar things, it´s not been a punishment or a task, it´s been just the result of your own choice to become free and untamed, eternal and sovereign. A master, a living god/dess, a sovereign. You´ve always been, but you had forgotten. If you read this, this is your friendly reminder and reassurance.

You are dearly loved, you are abundant beyond messure and your soul tribe is just waiting around the corner. You will receive all of it, the very moment you do not need it any longer. You get what you are. If you are fear, you´ll receive fear, if you are lack you will receive lack. And it´s funny, you can be abundant with a cuppa tea and the laughter of a friend or be a poor and lonely fool in a castle. Not because you are punished, but because you are a creator and you can fool and deceive the whole world including yourself, but not creation itself. It will mirror your being.

Integrity means to live who you are. Not to believe in values, but to live them, to embody your highest truth. Nothing is allowed to come between you and you.

Saturn the ruler of capricorn is in capricorn the next two years. He´ll deliver what you seeded. If you do not like the deliveries, you´ve gotta go within and be totally honest with yourself where you still corrupt yourself. When you have found your true self, nothing can harm you any longer. You will be save, no matter the circumstances, because you will no longer leave yourself. It is you with your eternal I Am. Your eternal light and your neverending love united within you.

May you be happy, may you be healthy, may you be free.