Month: June 2017

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Lovestories seen from inside and outside duality

When two people look at the same situation they perceive a total different reality. I described lately how I took pictures of nicely blooming roses, while a drunken guy thought me to record his mischievous actions.

Well, it´s been sometimes confusing for me as I am having different points of view at once, at the same time, since quite some years.

This started with an intense and unhappy lovestory many years ago, directly after I gave intend to drop karma. Well my whole life fell into pieces and I met this guy, that was from my own kind. Just he had been born into a Team Dark Family. He had psychic abilities, believed in the end of this world and that humanity deserves it. He thought all humans to be stupid and destructive and had a love-hate relationships with humanity in general and with me in specific. He brought my own unknown dark stuff out, made me yell, cuss  and face my shadow – but he´s also been the one that reminded me of true love. I remember that while that time I felt confused sometimes as I had to face two different points of view at once. I could see very clearly that we shared a deep love on a soul-level, I received signs and dreams all along the path. But the humans couldn´t get along without quarrels, as our points of view had been diametrically opposed. I joked that he and I walking besides would be a walking ying-yang-symbol and he agreed at this point. When we have been in-tune we could´ve easily moved mountains without any effort…but we did seldom 😉 He always tried to dominate me, as this has been what he believed in. And I drove him mad, cause he couldn´t rule over me. Our perceptions have been too different, always involved in a power-struggle. There had been a scene, where he was holding me close in his arms, I´ve been in heaven as it felt so good, and than he whispered in my ear: “We both are special, we are standing outside all laws.” I answered: “Oh, noone is outside the cosmic law.” And the magic was gone. Seen from a dualistic point of view this relationship ended, as we´ve been too different. Seen out of the perspective of the soul it´s been a “high-five”. Through these experiences I started to remember what true love really means and I reactivated his frozen heart. Team Dark lost a player, but it took me a while to recover from this opening of my own path and heart and to integrate these experiences.

Well since that time I am able to see things out of a soul-level, where everything, really everthing in our lifes occures to give us an opportunity to evolve. But the humans keep on playing their duality games. And here´s the point: You might know that the person that is your offender, perpetrator or bully is a co-worker, seen from a higher perspective, and therefore never stop loving them even for a splitsecond, and bless them no matter what they do. But they do not have access to that truth and their own higher aspects…so they will still try to harm you and dislike you anyway.

And that is the reason why you might love someone and stay away or alert for good reasons anyway. I know that some lightworkers might disagree in this point, but they will not walk with a miniskirt and huge diamonds rings alone through a ghetto at night anyway. I know that it is possible to do so, I´ve escaped in unbelievable ways myself sometimes, but I would advice caution here. Being a lightworker  doesn´t mean to not use common sense.

Why I shared this? Cause you might try to see the lovestory behind your challenging relationships and experiences. There are no unhappy lovestories, only some treasures still waiting in the dark. Heaven knows happy, but no endings.

Shine your light <3

Distractions on our path

Sometimes I receive teachings while my sleep-time. I guess that´s happening quite often, but I´m not always able to transfer these transmissions into my conscious mind. But this one came in quite intense, as I´ve been told it is really important at the moment:

When you think of all that is happening as a kind of game, than you can understand that distractions are a way to make a team not score as good as it could otherwise. Team Light is winning anyways…or seen from a non-dualistic perspective it has always prepared for winning, even when it´s seemed to have lost sometimes…But sometimes we seem to get lost in distractions, Team Dark (as it is unconscious) is using distractions to keep us off track. I´m an empath. I´ve got to confess that I´ve been easily distracted. Someone might need help, a friend calling in tears, or a guy showing up and making things somehow complicated…I used to be falling for all of that.

I realized that I´ve gotta be really aware what my priorities are. Here are some distractions I have faced, that seem to be quite common:

  1. When someone might really need help, that´s important. But I´ve spend a lot of time with people that just caused drama, to make sure, they will not have to evolve and still get attention. Where´s the point in joining them in this borrrrring repetition mode? Focus on those that are really moving forward.
  2. Or other people have no goals and priorities at all, but are distracting themselves and others to not feel the void in their life. Why join them onto their road to nowhere, nonsense and nohope?
  3. When a guy doesn´t know what he wants…he for sure doesn´t want me. Love isn´t complicated, only games are.
  4. Yes, I need to earn my living. But I´m living to express what I love. We shall not allow 3d stuff to get too serious.
  5. Yes, we have to clean-up our energy-field. But we have lived thousands of lifetimes on this planet, even in other galaxies, we killed each other a million times, been misused, traumatized, abandoned endlessly. Where´s the point in re-living all of that in this lifetime? Find the root-feeling, like abandonment or powerlessness, go into that and love it into the light. And than go out and have fun and not re-activate all experiences again and again.
  6. Yes there´s a dark agenda out there. But you cannot figure it out in all details anyway. Going too deep in conspiracies is just making people becoming confused. Stay aware, question things…but spend way more time focusing on what you want, instead of the unwanted.
  7. Do not resist circumstances you can not change at the moment. Use your energies for things, that are running smoothly. All that is in the flow is on your path. All that isn´t moving, you shoudn´t force. Might be it will move at another point in time, but don´t sit there waiting for it.
  8. Going within,  finding inner peace and clarity, is creating outer changes. It´s like magic. The outer world is reacting on our inner feeling. So instead of running around, go and meditate or breath calm, have a walk in nature. Things will sort them out afterwards much easier. And even when the outer world should still insist to be stressful, we can through a change in perception make things go much easier for us anyway.
  9. Do our possession own us or do we own our possessions? When you enjoy taking care for a castle with 50 rooms, than keep it. When you dislike all the work that stuff is causing, than let go of all the unused things, rooms, possessions.
  10. The same goes for relationships, memberships and everything we perceive as hardships.

You might find even more points…but I think, it is important generally to become aware what we really want.Does what we are spending our time, money, energy on really mirror our true values in life?

Do what is fun and joy, that´s never a distraction, but on your path and it´s creating good vibes.

Shine your light!

The next Monthly Rose Touch, 8th of July, 2017

The next free Group-Session in 2017 will take place 8th of July,  at 10 p.m. my time (Germany), what is 9 p.m. GMT, 1 p.m. PMT, 2 p.m. MST, 3 p.m. CST, 4 p.m. EST and so on. Here you can find your time zone: http://www.thetimezoneconverter.com/

When you can´t make it at the given time, just join at “your perfect time”, as this happens in the Quantum Field.

How does the Monthly Rose Touch work?

The Sessions take place in the Quantum field. At the given time you find yourself a nice place and make sure you won´t be disturbed for at least 30 minutes. Make it a comfortable experience, maybe lit a candle, burn incense, play relaxation music or whatever helps you to get into a calm, meditative state. Breath calm while you focus onto your heart, as it is your gate. Imagine to open your heart and enter a holy place, where you sit between roses to receive the high frequencies of OneLove delivered to you through the Inner Net. (The Inner Net is connecting all that is. You enter it through your consciousness, no devices needed.)

The Rose Touch is a quantum experience and the only things required are your intend to participate, to open your heart and to receive these high frequencies. While the session every subscriber is adressed as a part of the group, but I am also focussing for a moment on each participant at the end of the session, to send him what s/he might need personally.

If you want to participate put your name under this post or message me. Please don´t put someone elses name to the list, as free will is very important in this case. Sole exceptions are your own children that are under 14 years or your pets, as you are their care-takers. For each month you´ve got to sign in anew if you´ve enjoyed it and want more.

Guided Meditation: For the ones, that would prefer to be guided into the Meditation, you may use this link: The sacred Rosegarden.

Everybody else may just use his own music and meditation practise. The Session will take place at least 30 minutes, but some people enjoyed it for many hours. Trust your own feelings, how long you want to stay in the field.

A personal statement: I´m honored to be able to hold this field and deliver these outstanding energies. But this is not about me or my human persona. I want to make that very clear. It is  the coworking of the human with the divine and activating the pure Loveenergy that resides in all living beings. It is your own essence you´ll experience, what creates the blessings and healings. Please feel invited to share this message with likeminded, cause every participant is adding to the choir of energies and strengthening the field, although s/he benefits from it. Welcome to the New Earth. Let´s love it into life!

Shine your light precious soul!

Matrix – original and copy

I remember when I went into the cinema many years ago to watch the film “Matrix”. I´ve been electrified, that such a profound truth had been shown to the masses. Cause even when they do not get the message consciously, it has an effect on people to know the truth – or a part of the truth.

I always knew that our reality is not so very real, cause when I focused on it, especially while dawn, reality looks to me like an old-fashion TV-screen with the huge snowy pixels. In the last years I even started to see the strangs, or the shivery vibration of reality. Of course the spiritual teachings all over the globe have always teached that this world is maya, an illusion. But I could see it, long before reading such books. So of course I loved the film Matrix.

But after a while I had an insight. I knew how nature “felt like” and how our 3d reality “felt like”. The last one is grey and dense, sometimes it even felt to me like walking in syrup. All is heavy, slow, exhausting. So I realized that there had been two creations, existing parallel. The original one and the mental prison the 3d earth is. Maybe that´s the real background of the story about leaving the garden of eden. To me it is another focal point in consciousness. It is the judgemental ego-focused survival-consciousness, and the original matrix is this beloved planet gaia, going with the flow, co-operating and living in joy.

In the crimson circle they called the new earth “Theos”, but to me it has always been there, I remember that I came in from a place like Theos, the original, divine creation, just we had lost the access when diving into density. The New Earth is reached by consciousness. But trying to reach it through effort is not possible. It is your natural state of being. All we have to do is letting go of all that we are not. I know how difficult it is. But it is so worth it.

At the moment I experience so many coincidences. I have talks with totally different people, or reading articles, and all are bringing together pieces of a bigger picture.

My own healing work is that of a “grid-worker”, I help people to find their balance, I assist them to reconnect with their original blueprint, stabilzing their field. Yesterday, while one of my many adventures with one of my sisters, we recognized that there are two different grids on the earth at once. I now understand that this is what I experienced the first time very intensely, when being in Israel 2015. People had been harsh, even I had short quarrels and conflicts occuring everywhere I went. And than there was the other reality…a sky so open, light and bright. I now realize in hindsight that these have been the two different matrixes, realitities, co-existing. And I´ve been tuning in and out from one to the other. I think a lot of us do this. That´s what is making this whole process of integrating the energies so bumpy.

And yesterdays grid-work brought one really important insight. Stop, trying to fix the old grid, the old Matrix. Let it all go. Build up the new! This is what is now my only focus.

One thing in the the film matrix wasn´t true: When they woke up out of the machine matrix, they were living in a world that only provided very few luxury, for example the food was horrible. That couldn´t be further from the truth. All experiences on the new earth are way more sensual, colorful, have way more depth and brightness.

And I had to share this, as I know that there might be some people out there, that need this information. Sending much love to my co-workers out there, building the New Earth!

Shine your beautiful light!

 

How to recognize a good teacher/healer/therapist?

In my last article I´ve been writing about the wolfs, that are pretending to be shepherds. I can not count how often people have  told me about abusive behaviours of therapists, teachers and healers. And I´ve been stumbling myself quite some times about these con-guides, also.

Problem is that nice, kind people often do not have the mindset to recognize what is going on. We all have our filters and we often even chose the purple-pink glasses by intend. What is normally a good decision, as the world looks much nicer that way. But we can overdo it and become kind of naive.

So, how to recognize the good teachers/healers/therapists? Here are 12 keys to look for:

  1. They will assist you to find your own strenght, health, guidance.
  2. They do not compete with others and are not jealous at others.
  3. Their work/actions speaks for them. Their work brings healthy fruits.
  4. They will not make you dependent, but enabeling you, help you to be as free and happy as can be.
  5. They are walking their talk.  If someone talks love´n light and is mocking, gosipping about others, that´s not fitting together.
  6. They are practitioners. Be careful with experts that are theorists. Teaching about childcare but never cared for kids or relationship experts, married the 5th time with 30 and their last 3 mates in a row tried to commit suicide.
  7. They are open, clear and transparent. They explain what they do, ask for your permission to go ahead and you can ask questions, without feeling bad about it.
  8. They´ll strenghtening, encouraging and empowering you. If they belittle you, play with your anxiety or use your weakpoints – leave!
  9. The new earth is inclusive. Be careful with people that are pretending to be “better”, “exclusive” or offering their stuff for a chosen elite.
  10. They do what they love. To gain money, success is a natural occuring byproduct. Be careful if they only love what brings money, power, attention.
  11. They offer the same good service if 3 people are attending or 3000. If someone thinks 3 people are not worth his best, you might question if this is the right one.
  12. The compassion-factor. This has become my most important signifier. I have met people that were master-manipulators, but this has been the point not so easy to fake, especially when someone has to react spontaneously.

In most cases your healer/teacher/therapist will have some flaws, as we are all humans, we are all perfectly imperfect. But if s/he is not offering much of the 12 keys, please be careful.

In the end we all have to trust our own feelings. As lightworkers we tend to be tolerant and do not want to judge others. And that is good, but we shouldn´t harm ourselves out of tolerance for the other. Every time in my life I talked myself out of serious doubts, finding excuses for the others disrespect or rudeness, it´s been a mistake. But of course we learn from that, also. And one lesson every bad teacher/healer/therapist holds for us is to not give away the own power. Self-empowerment, awareness and inner alignment are the own abilities we have to strenghten to avoid pitfalls. We´ve been teached way too long that others “know better”. But no matter how famous the expert, in the end everyone of us is his own Master, embodying the divine light him- and herself.

Trust your own light and inner knowing <3

 

P. S. The picture above was taken while a audience with my personal Lama.

 

 

 

When the wolf becomes the shepherd

I wanted to write this article since a long time, but as it may stir up things, I had to ask myself if the outcome might be worth it. People love their Polyannaland, and spiritual people especially. To be honest, that includes me. I love green meadows, butterflies, love and peace.

But this meadow has to be inhabited by us and at the moment it is not as much as we wish it to be. I know we only come to a state of peace and harmony, when having done our shadow-work. That has to happen on a personal level, but it will reach out to all areas of life.

Kryon has mentioned that the time of fence-sitting is over. I call it “becoming real”, as we have to walk our talk now. He also said, that there will be a division, even between lightworkers. As I can sense the truth of that, and have seen some important reasons for that division, I have to write this article.

I can sense things that are “out of balance”. In retrospective that is why I am good in almost every job, even the ones that I do not like. Once I have had 648 packages of data on my computer-screen and had to give the ok for the payments, that have been encoded in these datas. But there was this one line on my screen that “felt strange”, I opened the data and found a huge mistake in it. People thought me to be really good with numbers, but no, I´m just good in sensing energy. People fear mistakes, therefore I have made myself a lot of enemies when finding an error. But I never wanted anyone to feel miserable or bad about it, I just wanted to “heal” things, so they can run smooth and easy. When I have a client in front of me, I tune into the energies and re-arrange them to be more stable and balanced. I do not judge them for having imbalances. We all have them and we all need assistance to come into alignment again from time to time, me too.

And I also do not want to blame the ones that have created imbalance and hide it…what is called darkness. I just try to bring in the light of consciousness, as we all have an effect on our surrounding and the ones that are teaching out of a state of imbalance, to people that tried to find balance and healing, are causing great harm sometimes.

Plus there are some therapists, healers and teachers out there, that have a hidden, selfish agenda. They offer healing although they would need it themselves much more. What they do not see themselves, as the narcissist has to keep up his false persona, the spiritual narcissist even more. They cannot and do not want to see the truth. Often we become healers, because of our wounds. Or we teach, because we´ve received so many lessons. Nobody is perfect and we all have some darkness inside of us. Darkness is not what we have to fear, the dark is just the unknown…what makes some people really dangerous is that they have this hidden agenda, their intend is a very selfish and cruel one. And some are even installed to do so. Who helps them? Who benefits from divided and confused lightworkers? Think about it. The ones I´m talking about have sold their soul to things like power, money etc. They are energetic vampires, they feed off those who come to them for healing and wisdom.

I stumbled “accidentely” a few times over those people and have been talking with friends lately about it, that have recognized these wolfish shepherds also. And as so many coincidents have come together lately, I decided to write about the wolfs, that pretend to be shepherds.

The way how this con-guides attract the sheps is that they provide real help. That´s how I stumbled over them. I saw that they have some truth, some real good things to offer. It really broke my heart when I saw why they offer it. That´s really malicious. They could help so many, but instead the shepherd is just offering green meadows to herd the sheps. And they are looking  for the nicest and kindest persons to cause the biggest harm!

These false shepherds have been working in traditional religious organisations and now they are also in between the New Age Community. Talking about Love´n Light and handing once in a while a shep to the butcher. This has been a clever concept, cause the bigger the crowd of devoties, the less one missing shep would be noticed. The other sheps will not protect the one shep. They want to believe that it had to be sorted out as it was ill. And to be very clear, some sheps have even witnessed something that should make them wonder…but they have decided to sell their souls likewise…to green meadows…until they are shed or butchered and that day is coming, that´s for sure. You think you just have to stay close to the wolf,  to serve him, please him, and you´ll be safe. But truth is, that when he looks at you, he´s thinking how yummy you might taste. They are masters of manipulation, they are even using your compassion against you. They tell stories about their own wounds and hardships and you open your heart, wanting to protect and nourture them. And you will, but the wolf won´t even be grateful for that, as he just laughs about the stupid sheps.

Dear ones, the old energy tries to survive by pretending to be working for the new earth, but they don´t. If you want to spot them, look at their actions, and the outcome of those. I know this article might not find many likes, but I didn´t come to be liked. I came to live me truth and to be of service to others. Their joy is my joy, their alignment is mine. And their suffering is saddening me, so I will speak up. We are all here to walk each other home.

The wolfish shepards can only exist as long as we give away our power to outer authorities, as long as we believe in hollow words, without looking at the cruel actions and poisoned fruits. Think about it.  There´s a choice to be made. Being a herded shep or wanting to walk your own path, following your own guidance? The real teacher, leader, healer will tell you that you are your own truth, health, guidance. They´ll assist you to re-connect with your own divine core. For the ones, that are interested in sorting out whom to trust and where to be careful, I´ll write a second article.

Shine your precious light!

 

Open and true communication

There seem to be so much communication going around, but when we take a closer look a lot of it is just noise. It is distracting, confusing and even creating division instead of understanding.

We do not use communication for what it was ment to be, to show ourselves truly, to exchange points of views and experiences, to than gain better understanding of “the other”. Instead we show a false persona and speak hollow words.

Instead of true communication we lie, cheat, manipulate, fool each other (and of course ourselves, as we try to convince ourselves very often through our talk). Why? Because we think we are not good enough. That we wouldn´t be accepted when we show ourselves truly and freely. We believe to be seen as weak or vulnerable when we really speak our truth.

Well, I find the opposite to be true. The more I am aware of my own strenght, the more I am able to be open. When something is needed in this time of masks and illusions than it is true, open communication.

Real communication brings us to a place where we are able to see what we might have in common and that leads to a union beyond our diversity. There is always much more we have in common with people, than what seperates us from them. Even enemies have often much in common: Their fear, their investment in lack-mentality, their longing for safety and their believe the other would prevent them from being safe and having enough.

People are afraid others wouldn´t respect them, if they knew their weakpoints. Well, when you allow yourself to show your true self you will respect yourself for your strenght and authenticity. If you respect yourself, your weakpoints stop being weakpoints, it is just the perfect imperfect way the divine shows itself through you. The ones that than turn their back on you, not allowing your honesty, have never been a real match. It is perfect that they run to worship another illusion, to distract them from their own vulnerability. You want people that love you for who you are, and they are not able until now.

Someone told me lately that I would be too open, that I would expose myself, when talking about childhood trauma or about having had an ailment. That as a healer, teacher and a living Rose I should be an example of the divine and therefore be the best I can be. Well, I had a good laugh. Cause that is what I am. Being aware of my divine self, although I was abused as a child or having myomas. I chose that path, to be as divine AND imperfect as everyone else. To show that we are always perfect in our imperfection. Always loved, no matter what happens and that we can heal ourselves, cause everything we need to overcome our obstacles is already within us and around us. Showing my perfect imperfections is the very best I can provide.

The new healer, teacher is not showing only one aspect of himself, the divine self, s/he is showing them all, cause the most important teaching and healing s/he is providing is the truth, that you have it all inside of you also. If they are imperfect humans, your imperfection is okay, if they are divine, you are divine.

True communication shows all that you have inside. Others will  compare notes and choose what is helpful for them. In this way we benefit from communication. We have fooled ourselves and others long enough. Time to get real, to really show up, to really exchange our knowledge and truth.

When people speak to me one-on-one they dare to be real, to speak their truth, show their weakpoints. They know they can trust me, because I have been through it all myself. I know darkness, that´s why I can hold the light. I am compassionate, not because I am more holy than they, but because I am human, just like they. We have to make peace with our human self to embody the divine self.

When there is nothing to hide, that´s how we truly shine your light!

The freeing of the throat chakra

I am living a life that is filled with wonders. It really is, they are sometimes happening to me, sometimes happening through me or witnessed by me. Often these wonders have had many little steps of preparing before a huge groundbreaking step could be made, that seems like an unbelievable wonder, coming out of the blue. Literally in this case, as the color of the throat-chakra is blue.

I have been silenced and killed for speaking my truth so very often, like so many of us have been. Experiencing to stay in silence when we should have spoken up, or to have spoken, when we should´ve stay silent. Whatever we did, it always had lead into trauma of some kind.

Exactly one year ago I was told by a guy that I should be more careful with my self-expression, as I´d not be aware of the power of my words. I looked at him and thought that he is not aware, that this power he projected onto me, was also his own and that he silenced me so often in other lifes because he struggeled with his own power and voice. Well, this time he didn´t kill me physically, but took my voice in other ways with much cruelty. We were a perfect match of suppressed self-expression. But it could do me no real harm, as I am using all adversities now  as stepping stones and try to transmute all energies. And a lot of it had to do with freeing my throat and taking back my voice.

I have described a few weeks ago in a blogpost, how my creativity had been suppressed in my childhood and how I had started with writing almost 12 years ago. Many things happened to free my throat in these years. Bringing out my first two books the last 5 years, I have had  a writers podcast, I´ve been creating this blog a year ago, in a language that I almost not even dared to speak, because of mean mocking about my abilities to express myself in english. In the beginning of 2017 I even started to have little vids on a YouTube-Channel and I recorded two guided meditations into the “Inner Rosegarden”. Recently I had started a german blog about my childhood abuse and speaking about my true self as a Healer of Hearts. I have started to express myself in many ways, but I never dared to sing, as I´ve been unable to hold the tone and have been deeply shamed for that. I had also described in that blogpost how I nevertheless once have sung a song to my daughter when she was a baby and how she had felt the love in my voice and stopped crying and fell asleep.

But still I couldn´t hold a tone and was very shy even when singing a happy birthday together with others when my voice was hardly heared at all. Well, yesterday I went to an online meeting for “Balancing your throat chakra”.

Today I suddenly starting singing. And don´t get me wrong, I´ll not start a new business and I will not become a great singer. But I used my voice naturally, expressing my feelings openly and not feeling ashamed at all. To prove it I have today recorded the song I have been singing to my daughter as a baby. It was created out of two Elvis-Songs, that came to my mind that night 30 years ago, when I had tried to comfort my crying daughter. Today this song, you hear when opening the link: The freeing of the throat-chakra had closed a beautiful circle. I have just changed the lyrics a little bit.

A deeply felt “Thank you” to everyone, that helped me to become free, like a bird in a tree.

We can only perceive our own nature

I was wondering a long time, why people can not see the love and beauty all around them. And I´ve got to confess that for a very long time I tried to help them see. But we can not. It´s been a lesson that took me quite some years, made me knock so often at the wrong doors, or wait for people that they finally move to a nicer state of being. But that has been just a distraction from my own path and a total waste of time and energy…well, but of course it doesn´t really matter, as there is no lack of time and energy in the multiverse.

Must have been eight or nine years ago, when I wrote a story about an angel, visiting hell and trying to tell the tortured souls they might just very easily leave their pots of boiling water. But noone listened, they just wanted her to stay next to them, to hold their hands while they moaned about the pain, instead of just leaving it behind. There was even one guy, trying to convince her to join him, as this would be a luxurious yacuzzi and they might have a hot pot party. If I find that story, I might translate it in english and post it, it is quite funny – and true.

For a long time I thought people are just fooled into darkness, but more and more I see, that it is their free choice. You might offer them as much love and light as you want, they´ll not be able to deal with it. Even when they pretend that they want it, they do not. You can send them a Jesus and they´ll nail him to the cross, sell the pieces and parts of that cross, kill and torture others in the name of Jesus…and not understand one of his words.

For a long time I thought something must be wrong with me, cause somehow people just couldn´t see or hear me. Literally. People almost run into me very often. Physically seen it is not easy to oversee or overhear me. Some people told me it must be my faulth, that I do not see myself, or do not show myself. And of course I was so willing to see it as my failure. It is not, all is well and I received some masterlessons lately.

I tried to tell people in my office that I do not want to hear things about violence, rape and sexual abuse, especially not the details out of a police report…but they just did not hear it. They reacted on the first half of my sentence (cause they normally listen), but the rest they just did not hear. If they would have listened, they would have to face their hunger for destortion, and that´s not what they want to see…and change. Today I even left the room in the middle of their talk, without saying one word, I turned around and simply left, let them literally speak into empty air and they did not react at all to my unusual and rude behaviour. Astonishing.

I exposed some really unknown chapters of my life lately and people that are normally following every move of me and that are really curious just did not see it. Interesting.

Yesterday I read an eye-opening story in “Memoirs of a Master”. In this story the Master visits a shop in an Elvis-Las- Vegas-Dress and at the end there is a message over the loudspeaker saying “Elvis has left the building”…and noone reacts. People do not see and hear what is out of their own vibration. And in this story it is explained that this happens for safety-reasons. So when I was trying it today, acting in a rude manner and people didn´t respond at all, I realized it is true.  And for the first time I felt good, when not being seen and heared. I´ve been dragged to the pyre too often by people that called it a bonfire, as destroying what they weren´t able to build had been their passion by free choice. No need to hang around with them. We can not make the blind see, unless they want it.

Today when coming from work I entered the tram, that´s been overly crowded, as it´s been rush-hour. On the ground there was a broken white Rose, maybe it felt out of a bouquet. Noone saw the flower, I wondered how it comes that they did not step onto her. So I picked her up, carried her home and gave her water. I posted a picture and the comment of Coco, that this flower is like fresh snow, pure, made me realize, that she would have seen and picked the Rose also. Her words showed who she is. People can only perceive purity and beauty, when they have it themselves.

We can not heal the darkness of others, just remove our own (we all have it to some degree). But when we shine our light, the right ones will see it. Isn´t that perfect?

Receiving the Monthly Rose Touch myself

Yesterdays Monthly Rose Touch-Session had so beautiful energies in it. I felt really happy, light and joyful, when the energies where transmitting. And I was sweating really hard, as so much energies came through, it was really an intense experience.

As always, I´d love to hear about experiences from participants, if they feel like sharing, cause I am learning myself every session. But you all felt great from my perspecive 😉

Yesterday the session had overlenght and at the end I received the RoseTouch myself, what is not always the case. The reason why I am sharing my own experience is, that by sharing we are learning and gaining greater understanding.

Being a healer doesn´t spare us ailments and hardship. Just the opposite. Many of us went through tough times as a prepation for our calling. It is important to understand that our ailments aren´t the real problem. They are no punishment and they do not show up to make us suffer. They show up, as a call to release the suffering and pain, that already exists. There is already an imbalance and the ailment brings it into awareness. And very often we incarnate into a family that has that issue since a long time.

I have had a difficult month, as really traumatic suppressed childhood memories showed up. And it´s not only been this memories I had to deal with, but it changed the perspective on my whole life, what felt like totally loosing ground. And that had an impact on my physical body as well, that reacted with all kinds of stuff. I am a healer of hearts, I know not much about physical illnesses. But I experienced again and again that physical ailments have a root in energetic imbalance and therefore healing the emotions, bringing in awareness, changes the body often also.

When remembering the sexual abuse in an already totally disturbing childhood it was literally a shock to my whole system. I really have to thank my daughter, as she recognized the shock and provided first-aid. I learned from that, that nothing is more important after a shocking experience, than to give a safe space where one can process the experience. I didn´t have a safe space in childhood, therefore the shock was frozen (trauma is out of my point of view a frozen state, a time-trap). When it now showed up, there was first the same experience to not have a safe space to process, until my daughter recognized that and helped me.

And I´ve gotta say that in the beginning I really wondered if I would be able to continue my work as a healer without any impact, cause I went through flashbacks and a lot of physical stuff, that´s been typical for trauma. But when I felt inside, the Rose always sended calm, loving signals, so I tried to just relax and trust.

I had a really hard moment when I remembered how my abuser, who died 1981, had contacted me arround 2009/2010. Well, dead people have never been dead to me, but normally I met them in my dream-state at night. His way to contact me was unusual, first showing his presence with inner pictures and than coming through, while I was chatting with a clearvoyant friend in another town. She saw and heared exactly the same I did. I saw it and she typed it. And today I know why she witnessed it. She was the perfect energetic match. Well, when he came through he had a personal message for my mother. In the end, he told me he´s sorry and showed me a Rose and golden Light. I will never forget this experience, because I felt the loving energies of the Rose, what is unforgettable. Just I didn´t understand the Rose he gave me, cause it would take 7 years before I´d experience it again, to than embody it myself. At that time I had accepted his appologize, but now I had to understand what he was really sorry for. I will not go into any details, but it´s been really traumatic. He´s been an alcoholic and I´ve been living alone with him. And than he was the one to show me the Rose-Energy? Hard to  process.

Well, there is always a bigger plan. After my journey to Israel 2015 I had contacted Kahuna Kalei, as I was so often told about my mission while that journey and I could feel it, but didn´t know how to bring it into my life. She told me to do Inner Child Work and that I had chosen this lifepath by intend, to show and teach what I learned. She also said, I had experienced so much sadness in my life out of contrast, as I wanted to bring my true essence, joy, here. She told me my childhood was a preparation for my calling. Just, at that time I didn´t know that it had been worse than I already knew.

So when I went up yesterday morning I was a bit unsure how the first group session would work out. Could I hold the energies as always? Well, yes, I could. And I received extralessons and teachings. I went out in nature, as always when preparing for the group session. The energies where building up beautifully and the picture above was taken under an apple tree. I ended my walk at a place with Rosebushes and benches, that is nearby my home. I sat at one of the benches, recognizing arround another bench there was dirt and broken beerbottles on the ground. I thought how strange it is that people come to such a lovely place to than create such a mess. Well, I looked at the Roses and felt the beautiful energies building up, when a young man came along with a sixpack. He chose the bench where all the dirt was, sat down, opened a bottle and dropped the bottle cap on the ground. I felt a bit uncomfortable as his energy really didn´t fit with the Rose and I always make sure to not interrupt the process of the building up energies. Well, plus I still felt kind of vulnerable, because of my childhood memories with the alcoholic. I felt inside, what to do and received the answer to stay and focus on the Roses, maybe to stand up and take a few pictures for Facebook. I felt better, when I moved arround to find the right angle to make a nice snapshot. Suddenly I recognized a strange movement from the bench with the beer-drinker. As if he would stoop down and hide behind a column. Weird. As he didn´t come closer, I kept on taking pictures of nicely blooming roses. The guy stood up, went to a trash-can to put the empty bottle there and than went away. As I´ve been in a totally other mood, it took me a while until I realized that he had thought, I might take pictures of him and he might get a bill from the municipal for cleaning-up all the mess arround the bench. Same situation, two people, totally other reality. Gorgeous lesson!

Than the Rose started talking, saying she ´s got a message for all victims of abuse or violence of any kind: “The experience is temporary, the villain in a suffering, very unconscious state. Do not join him there. Focus on your Inner Rosegarden, your true core. It stays whole, untouched and pure – always.”

I went home very happy. And later, when the transmission took place I felt so much love, joy and fun. Very high, light vibrations flooding through me to the participants. I was very glad that my memories didn´t create a blockage or anything like that, so I´ll be able to keep on with this beautiful work. At the end of the session, that had overlenght yesterday, I´ve been told to lay my left hand on my solarplexus and the right hand on my sacral-chakra, where I had the most trouble with, and I received the Rosetouch myself. Than the Rose gave me teachings, saying that even the drunken guy felt his behaviour was  not appropriate, when a much higher energy was present. She said the bad boys do not want to be exposed, because they fear punishment, but also because when they are exposed they would have to face their own behaviour and make the unconscious conscious, what they do not want. She than told me it´ll be part of my work in the future to help those woman that want to leave their trauma behind. They have to feel safe and empowered, to leave the victim mentality and build up their lifes out of a state of strenght.

The Rose is bringing to everyone what s/he needs to reconnect with their divine blueprint. Everyone has therefore a very unique experience. Sharing those is perfect, so not everyone has to make the same.

So, these are my insights:

  • We all need sometimes help.
  • The evolvement never stops.
  • All is conspiring in our favour, when we allow it.
  • We choose our frequency and the frequency chooses the perception of a situation.
  • Noone is condemned. No villian will be punished. They even try to help, when they finally really understand what they did.
  • Do not join the perpetrator in his vibration.
  • There is a masterplan at work, to turn even the worst into a blessing.
  • Love is the ultimate Masterhealer.

Thank you to everyone, walking this path and shining the light!

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