As guilt is a heavy and useless burden, we might need forgiveness to let go and free us. No matter what the issue, forgive as soon as you can. Others and yourself.
It´s of no use to cling on old wounds. Clean them and heal them as soon as possible. Don´t ignore them. If you feel anger or pain, process it as part of the cleansing, let the stuff out, to not let it get infectious. Than let go. We are all imperfect beings, all of us fail sometimes. That is just part of the human experience.
Sometimes I listen to elderly people that are angry at their siblings for stuff 50 or more years ago. Can you imagine that? 50 years, seasons coming and going, and not fully enjoying it, cause the injustice of the other, having taken a piece of chocolate or broken a toy, is still alive, while the persons are already on their way to the grave? That´s like running around day by day carrying a rock around. Who would want do that?
It´s the most beautiful form of forgiveness when both involved parts can talk to each other and let go together, but very often that is not possible.
So you can do that easily as an inside job. No matter if you forgive someone else or yourself. In most cases people find it way more harder to forgive themselves, but no matter what the issue might be, to not forgive just makes no sense. If you stay unhappy you will just make people around you unhappy also and that will ruin theirs and your life. So where is the point in that? More to feel bad about? More rocks to carry?
Some years ago a close friend did me really wrong and we cutted the contact. She lived 4 years with a heavy burden, thinking about her failure every day. Well, at this point in time I hardly ever thought of her at all, but lived a happy and free life, while the concept of guilt still had her in the greedy claws, totally useless und unnecessary.
She had lost first father and than mother in these 4 years and suffered, regretting that through own failure she had lost me also. Finally she saw in the internet that I seemed to live my dreams, had moved in another town and been writing books. That already made her feel better. She hadn´t ruined my life. So she took herself a heart and wrote me a letter. She was afraid of my reaction, but knew she had lost me already, so it couldn´t get much worse, if she would receive an angry answer or no answer at all. But of course she didn.´t. We found peace together.
Sometimes we can´t talk to the person we did wrong, but need to lighten our soul anyway. I guess that might have been a reason, why the idea of a confession box came up. To free the suffering soul from the burden and find forgiveness. Well, of course in the old energy also good ideas have been misused for control and power. The idea behind it stays good anyway. If you have a hard time forgiving yourself and need assistance, maybe you can find someone you trust and who would never judge you or misuse their knowledge.
If not, find other ways to process your thoughts and feelings. What often helps is to write it down. Afterwards you might even install a little ritual and give your „sin“ to a river or burn it in a fireplace. Or you might give it to mother earth and bury it. Whatever feels right to you, do it!
No matter what part you played in that scenery of pain, forgive the other or yourself to live a free and happy life.
Even if you know the other involved person really, really hates you still, forgive them anyway. Don´t give away your power, don´t allow anyones bad feelings to poison your life. Honestly, very often others don´t even need a reason to hate you. Their reason lays in their own person and point of view. You just reflect an inner feeling back to them, maybe their mum or whoever. Haters always find a reason to hate.
I made co-workers really hatefull just by not joining the complaining coir, but having a smile on my face. They really hated it when I came along and been happy, cause that made them suffer even more from their own darkness. Of course they just hated themselves and their way of living and working, but some might never get that. Should that make me feel bad? Should I feel guilty for being happy while they suffer? Or should I be angry at them, because they gosipp and make mean remarks? To me they are a perfect reminder to be even more happy to live a joyful life, untouched by them. Maybe one day their darkhouses are going to crash and they come out of it, cause it´s just more fun to be happy. But that is also none of my business.
We can´t change others and we can´t change the past. But we are in charge of our lifes and the now-moment is the one, where we are planting the seeds of our future. Let it be a free life and a happy future. You deserve it. Everyone deserves it. Who would run around carrying a heavy rock? Would look a bit strange. If you don´t forgive the other and yourself you are doing exactly that. Don´t! Be happy and free.
Shine your light!